seems all goes along and i have things under control then all hell breaks loose yet again.  i have been feeling so happy and in control and today i feel sad and pissed off.  i can't get past or rid of an issue in my past, he keeps coming back.  now i have a wedding to go to today and i will be surrounded by people drinking.  i'm not sure how to deal with this.  maybe i am just stressed and anxious about that.  life is a bitch sometimes. i have made it to day 103 and i dont want to go back.   i just want to make it through this day.  i feel like i am being tested for some reason when in fact i should be thinking of going and just enjoying the time out.  shit