Been really tired these past few weeks. It's probably because I never get much more than 5 hours sleep a night. It's my own fault, but it makes me kind of blah. Been thinking a lot about my future lately and what may be in store for me. This time I am looking at both the positive and negative aspects and possible scenarios. I am trying to be more objective and figure it all out. I don't want to settle for something that I can't live with, yet I must be flexible and not rule out something because it's not exactly what I want. The worst case would be to end up back here lonely, sad and crying my heart out again. One can have a dream and move forward to it with every cell in her being, but one must also not live in a fantasy world either. I am trying to find a balance in life and stay very positive always. Not easy with so many changes coming at us at light speed, but I am doing pretty well, I think. Last night I called my ex-in-laws to ask them if they would take care of my dogs while I was away in Washington State. This was extremely difficult for me and no one but another lonely soul like me could possibly understand this. My immediate family is tiny, scattered and we don't have much contact with each other, so my ex-in-laws WERE my family and I loved them very much. We used to have a lot of fun and our days were filled with love and caring for each other. When my ex and I split, I lost them too and I was horrified and devastated by this. I emailed them once in a while, but I couldn't bear to phone them. They never called me during this time. This was the first time I spoke to my ex-mother-in-law since the breakup in April '07. It was awkward for both of us. I cried for a while after I hung up with her. I will never have that love back. I am over my ex, but I guess I am not over loosing the only family besides my own that I really cared about. Maybe they still love me, I know I still love them. I love you all!
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Pretty lady, one of the most wonderful things about you is the fact that you are so warm and caring towards other people. Of course your inlaws still love you. You are a wonderful person and nothing can change that. 8 more days.. Life is getting a little brighter with each passing day. :)
I love you :)
i found it really hard with my mum in law but we are ok now. don\'t know how she would be if she knew i had another man though. She looks after my dog when i\'m away too. I\'m sure your mum in law is just angry at her stupid son that he lost someone as lovely as you. have a good weekend honey, love you lots alison xxxx