Does anyone else get physically sick to their stomach, when the STBX calls or wants to come over? He called about 45 minutes ago. He's being nice and saying he's still my friend and even said that he would go out to movie with me if I wanted to do something sometime. Oh PLEASE!! Do I really need you to throw me a bone, like that? Even though I am 100 percent sure I have moved on and don't love him like a husband anymore, I still am not ready to be his buddy, ol' pal.  My stomach is in knots and I don't know why. I want him to take care of the paperwork and get this divorce going. He mentioned today that it could take 2 months to a year depending on the court backlog. Sheesh! I want to get on with my life. I have changes and plans I want to make in my life.  He's coming over tomorrow evening to give me a bill that came to him by mistake and pickup the fishing poles because his Internet buddies are meeting up this weekend. Minus one. The wife of his best internet friend. Guess she was dumped too. Maybe she signed up here at DS. Haha! Christie if you are here here's a big hug for you! Usually husbands leave because of a woman that they found on the internet. Ours left because our husbands found each other and encouraged the other one to leave us. I am not saying they are gay, but it does seem odd that we both were abandoned around the same time. I would like to really know why this happened, whatever the reason.Sorry  if this journal seems a little weird today,  but I do feel so much better after writing my thoughts out and the knot has gone away.If anyone is still reading, I am doing very well overall, just having a few melancholy days. Love to all !