Why
Should I be starting to accept that you're gone? I thought I was accepting it it but today I looked at your picture and broke down again. I know you're not coming back but I can't believe it, or maybe I refuse to believe it. It hurts too much to believe that I won't be able to see you or touch you and it's knocking me lower and lower. It's draining me day by day and today is a really bad one.
Even people I considered close friends have made some stupid remarks about moving on. One was surprised that I didn't want to go to a concert next week. You've been gone for five weeks and he said my problem is that I just can't deal with change. That's one idiot I won't waste time on anymore. I'm just angry at everything right now. The one that calls herself your best friend has been talking to me and telling me that it's worse for the kids because their mother is gone. You and I talked and we both knew you didn't consider her your best friend but she keeps saying you'd want her to do this or that for us. She told me to tell the kids to call her and I did but they don't want to talk to her so she tells me again. The kids are adults and I'm always there for them but I have to deal with my own pain as well. I want her to mind her own business and leave us alone and she's almost pushy to the point that I'm gonna have to tell her to back off and leave us alone. I just know if I do it now it's not going to be in a nice way. She keeps saying we should have a coffee and talk but she's never lost anyone. She has both parents, her kids, her husband and she keeps saying she knows how I feel, because she lost her best friend.
Sharon I can't believe how much this hurts. I need you in my life so much and I don't know how much more I can take. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I'm 10 years older than you and I was supposed to be the first one to go. You were my life. What am I supposed to do now? Everytime I look at your picture it crushes me. I can't look at your picture, I can't sleep in the bed, and I just want people to leave me alone. Waking up is a chore I'm so tired of because it's another day without you. I keep hearing that it gets easier but how can it. We did so much together. I could keep venting but it won't do any good.
I love you so much babe and I don't have words to describe how much I miss you and need you. I just don't have the words.
Mike
Even people I considered close friends have made some stupid remarks about moving on. One was surprised that I didn't want to go to a concert next week. You've been gone for five weeks and he said my problem is that I just can't deal with change. That's one idiot I won't waste time on anymore. I'm just angry at everything right now. The one that calls herself your best friend has been talking to me and telling me that it's worse for the kids because their mother is gone. You and I talked and we both knew you didn't consider her your best friend but she keeps saying you'd want her to do this or that for us. She told me to tell the kids to call her and I did but they don't want to talk to her so she tells me again. The kids are adults and I'm always there for them but I have to deal with my own pain as well. I want her to mind her own business and leave us alone and she's almost pushy to the point that I'm gonna have to tell her to back off and leave us alone. I just know if I do it now it's not going to be in a nice way. She keeps saying we should have a coffee and talk but she's never lost anyone. She has both parents, her kids, her husband and she keeps saying she knows how I feel, because she lost her best friend.
Sharon I can't believe how much this hurts. I need you in my life so much and I don't know how much more I can take. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I'm 10 years older than you and I was supposed to be the first one to go. You were my life. What am I supposed to do now? Everytime I look at your picture it crushes me. I can't look at your picture, I can't sleep in the bed, and I just want people to leave me alone. Waking up is a chore I'm so tired of because it's another day without you. I keep hearing that it gets easier but how can it. We did so much together. I could keep venting but it won't do any good.
I love you so much babe and I don't have words to describe how much I miss you and need you. I just don't have the words.
Mike
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