Today is Wednesday "Hump Day" as some of us say. I rented some movies yesterday and couldn't even watch them. I fell asleep. I woke up to the credits and grabbed my water, went to my room, turned on the t.v. and fell asleep again. I woke up at 6:45 when my alarm went off and drug my lazy bottom out of bed at 7:10. James says it is all the stress, I guess he's right. I know I have ot go thru this to feel it all and heal, it just doesn't feel very good. I am going to the nursing home today to visit wtih some of the people there and take someone some flowers. I don't know anyone there anymore, it has been so long since I have been there, too long. I also have to do some things for the Memorial Service on Saturday. I wish we already had the service in a way, just so I know I made it through, and on the other hand I don't want to do it at all because it is just proof that she isn't here anymore. Life is full of trials and tribulations, I know...but having that knowledge doesn't always help. I know it is up to me to make it and make something out of what God gave to me, it is just taking me some time.I received some messages yesterday from someone who sounded so desperate. I feel so bad for him. I have tried to give him advice (because as we all know it is easier to give advice than to actually follow your own advice!) and make him feel better. I don't know if I helped or not, but he was on my mind quite a bit yesterday. I hope he is o.k.I spoke with my friend last night. I called him when I picked up the newspaper with my moms obituary in it. He is always there for me and I appreciate him so much. He is always such a joy to talk with. He really cracks me up!!! Laughter is the best medicine they say. But, really...he makes me feel good. I have a strong sense of who I am (at least I did before my mom died), but it always feels wonderful to have someone tell you how wonderful you are. I hope that makes sense. I enjoy visiting with him and emailing with him. He is a special man who deserves so much more than what he has been dealt. I hope one day soon he finds what he deserves. Tongiht is my margarita night with the girls, it was rescheduled from Thursday to tonight. I have no idea who all will be there, I just know it will Kay, Merry, and me for sure. I am sure we will laugh and cry, hopefully more laughing than crying. I am looking forward to it.One of our competitors (who happens to be friend of my boss) just came in and brought me breakfast. So sweet! Now I have to make some coffee to have with my Guisado taco. Yummy!I hope everyone has a fabulous day!!
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You\'re a beacon of positivity! You really see things clearly and in the right mindset. I only hope I stop seeing that sad face soon! You will come through all this well though, just be patient and give it time. I can tell you have alot of great support, that helps alot!
Perhaps that friend you talk to already found what he deserves?
...and whats a Guisado taco?
A guisado taco is a flour tortilla filled with guisado (cubed meat, the mexiacn version of stew) and is very good!!
I wish I could fast forward the clock, but then again, there would be so much that I would be missing out on. I just have to enjoy this ride, no matter how scary or painful it may be at times. You are right, I do have a lot of support and it does help a lot! Only time will tell if my friend has found what he deserves, one can only hope and pray.
Loosing a parent is tough but you are strong and you will get through this because you have no other choice. Remember what ever you do this Sataurday is really the last thing you can do for your mom. That special, so do what you have to do, to make it special for you. I gave a short speach at my fathers funeral and it was the hardest thing I ever did and about the only time though out the entire thing when I was not crying my eyes out. I was glad I did but I am also glad I will never have to do it again for him. I am so sorry that you are going through so much but you will grow and become even stronger, if you can believe that. My thought and prayers will be with you and your family this weekend.
I LOVE guisado tacos!
thoughts and prayers for you
and enjoy your night out you deserve a night of fun
hugssssssssssss
gerri
Have a great time tonight. You deserve it!
I know I dreaded going through the memorial services...but it was so nice to see all the people that cared about him...it was very touching. I hope you have fun out with your friends! You deserve it!! HUGS