Things are looking pretty bad at the moment...I don't know what I'm really doing, just kind of floating around from post to post.
Currently I am at 6th form studying psychology and sociology, I also have two jobs, the first at Primark as a weekend staff member and the second as a waitress at a nightclub. My sister is not only family but my best friend so I spend slot of time with her and my boyfriend wants to spend every waking moment with me because he has nothing else to do with his time other than sleep or play video games which means that there is so much pressure on me, hes always bored or missing me, constantly testing me seeing what I'm doing or where I am and when I can next see him. I do live him but recently he's just making it so difficult for me to actually love him, he never actually listens to anything I say which means that our dissagreements always evolve into arguments. I just don't know whether I want to be with him anymore, everything feels like it's ten times harder thn it should be, and I fully understand that life isn't fair, or easy but this just feels too difficult, like the time I spend with him is mainly being upset or pissed off rather than happy like I should be. At the beginning I saw a future with us, getting our own place then possibly marriage and kids but now all I see is misery, and him hiding things from me... He's recently decided that he doesn't need to tell me things that may upse me or that I may bot Luke regardless of what I think. I don't know what to do, I'm so confused and I dot know how to solve it.
I want to move out and get a place of my own - that much I know, but I also know I'm not ready to live on my own or capable of supporting myself while staying at school. I just need some space away from people and to just be on my own for a while, everyone keeps telling me that I can't do things, everytime I find something I enjoy and look into pursuing it as a possible career everyone tells me how it can all go wrong and why I would fail. Not the best thing I have to admit.
Currently I am at 6th form studying psychology and sociology, I also have two jobs, the first at Primark as a weekend staff member and the second as a waitress at a nightclub. My sister is not only family but my best friend so I spend slot of time with her and my boyfriend wants to spend every waking moment with me because he has nothing else to do with his time other than sleep or play video games which means that there is so much pressure on me, hes always bored or missing me, constantly testing me seeing what I'm doing or where I am and when I can next see him. I do live him but recently he's just making it so difficult for me to actually love him, he never actually listens to anything I say which means that our dissagreements always evolve into arguments. I just don't know whether I want to be with him anymore, everything feels like it's ten times harder thn it should be, and I fully understand that life isn't fair, or easy but this just feels too difficult, like the time I spend with him is mainly being upset or pissed off rather than happy like I should be. At the beginning I saw a future with us, getting our own place then possibly marriage and kids but now all I see is misery, and him hiding things from me... He's recently decided that he doesn't need to tell me things that may upse me or that I may bot Luke regardless of what I think. I don't know what to do, I'm so confused and I dot know how to solve it.
I want to move out and get a place of my own - that much I know, but I also know I'm not ready to live on my own or capable of supporting myself while staying at school. I just need some space away from people and to just be on my own for a while, everyone keeps telling me that I can't do things, everytime I find something I enjoy and look into pursuing it as a possible career everyone tells me how it can all go wrong and why I would fail. Not the best thing I have to admit.
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