Tonight's question is why am I still here? why am I still alive..one reason is because I dont have any fucking pills. Second reason is actuslly im not writing that in here. eaten ice cream today. what a waste of engery I knew Id just end up feeling like this. Dad wants me to go to the docs..get some dietry stuff. whatever. Im fine. Im fine I really am fine. I know no other way. Destroyed my space witht he painting boards because my mother went into my fucking room once again. whole room is ruined I cant even breathe in here. cant breathe right now. just little shallow breathes. I just want to fucking sleep. I just want to really really die now. Tried to be positive. Got rid of the glue. 5 days glue free. but this weight is still crushing my shoulders. If I wake up tomorow I will be so fucking angry.