It feels like I live only for glue. I just want to get out of everything all the time. Like this morning, it is 8.15 am I woke up at around 7.15 and I've already attempted to get high, cept all I got were these twitches because its a bad type of glue. I just wanted to prolong my sleep. Yesterday I went out and brought some glue, the right type, and didn't even hallucinate..it was just black and I still wasn't right for my exam that I had in s few hours. I went and saw Nick after my exam and said sorry becuse I lied to him and I still feel really bad for it. We ended up talking for an hour. All this stuff I say to him..it still gets me feeling like I'm heading no where fast. I want to stay in bed for the rest of the day. That way I won't be tempted to go to my car and get glue and also because I have my mosquito net around my bed and its like I am int his warm safe make beleive space that hasn't been ruined by anyone. But..there are things to be done and it is unfair on Rose to be by herself all day.