My biology teacher sent home a letter to the whole class saying how our last assesment wasn't handed in on time and that this next assesment on IVF was going to have weekly checks to see how we are doing. Of course last week when I got the letter home I came home from work and my Mom had put it on the table and then came up to meet me at the door saying why havnt I done my homework for bio.One, it wasnt homework and two, I was on of the ones to do it. in the letter the dates were all wrong she wrote march which has already been. So last night I was doing my research on IVF and filling out these sheets she gave us on the source and the key points and stuff. I wasn't sure if I had referenced it right so I was going to ask her today. In class she just gives out so many sheets and its always writing. She goes so fast and NEVER hands back any of our tests to see what we did wrong.  Anyway..so today I went at break and to her room to see her about it. She was coming out of her room and I said "oh canI ask you something about my IVF thing please?" and she goes "no, I have to get my tea. I have year tens next and the take up all my time.." year tens dont need credits. the seniors are more important than them. She says "its easy all you have to do is answer the questinons" and then she goes on to tell me while I folloow her how to write an essay..When I try to say that I actually just wanted help on how to refernce somthing she says I got to go now and dissapears intot eh staff room. I felt so let down. Iunno why cos I knew she was a crap teachwer anyway but its the fact that I got a letter home which idnt even make sense and last night I tried so hard to figure it out and ugh she just goes and shuts me down. Now I dont een want to complete the fucking IVf thing. With everything going on and me being so tired I felt the tears hitting my eyes. I blinked heaps and they went. I then went to find my friend and he said he haddn't done it yet. So I went to my polo friends where I always sit and threw myself down. Peri asks if Im alright and I say yeah..just this schoool and everything..and I feel my voice breaking and thenI start to cry and I cant breathe and Peri andSam were really shocked..they had never seen me cry..I just couldnt control it. Then PEri fucking comes sits beside me like RIGHT beside me and starts strokingmy back and I dont like being touched and I just wanted to be alone. They obviously were taken aack by me crying because they went on to quickly change the subject and I just started at this poster on the wall. They think I was being so pathetic even thought they didnt say anything because they thought I was just crying over bio. But everything has been building up.  How can I tell Peri whats going on when she has the perfect family situation, is happy and confident within herself. She thinks self harm is pathetic because she doesnt understand it. How could I explain everyhting to her.Ugh. So I quickly just went to my next class early. Just before bio we had a year 12 and 13 assembly about the school ball. They were announcing the venue and themes and shit. Aparantly the theme is a night at the oscars. Some freaking perfectionist chick got up and stared saying the costs and staing the obvious in this really primary schoolo high pitched voice. Then she was saying "obviously its a formal event so girls wear dresses and guys wear suits" That made me really angry. since when are girls not allowed to wear suits. I know I'd get laughed at but i wouldnt want to wear a dress. Then she went on about to say how last year we looked like hookers and this year it has to look more girly. THEN she went on about partners and how thwe girls have to advise thier boy partners what to wear. Since when is it compulasry for a girl to take a boy?! My point is how can I be proud of myself and feel alright when there is al whole lot of shit going on. Just last week the whole guys rugby team thought it would be fun to wait out side the dorothy's mates LGTB meeting and harras the people that came out. OMG I hate knowing I am a human. I hate this whole world atm.