JUST ONE MORE DAY
As the sun rises, the world around her rejoices.
She wakes saddened, that she has to face another day.
Nothing has changed as she lays there broken and alone,
and she knows now that even the God she loves will not be sending hope.
She has searched for that thread of hope each day before
Crying herself to sleep each night, praying that this night will be the last.
The only family she ever knew, used her, abused her and
Left her to live in memory and agony, wishing that age would do
What her love for God forbids.
Were she to speak her thoughts to another, they would implore,
Seek help, caring not that there is nothing for her to return to
Should she live yet Just One More Day.
Empty promises, by those just doing their job
Offering avenues that depend on resources she no longer has.
Her face, crusted with tears dried and plentiful
Like a soft summer rain.
No longer does she see the blue, behind the clouds
The rebirth of life in spring flowers and as she looks in the mirror
She has to wonder, “how long have I been dead”.
Tonight, as she has on other nights
She keeps the pills that will bring her quietly out of the hell she lives.
Praying that God and anyone who she somehow touched with love
Will forgive her for what she can no longer escape.
Her heart, she tried hard to keep pure
Loving even those who would wish her only pain.
Praying that when they meet once more
There will be nothing of this world to separate her from them.
This dark and tragic road is one she walks alone.
I've loved you all and loved you deeply
She sighs with her last breath.
Replies
Holy Crap, I hope this is not an online suicide note. I have felt what this is saying. Life is hard, Eternity is forever. Death is so final. I am sorry if this is you writing instead of just sharing something you read.
Write me a note or give me some way to contact you if you need to talk. I know talk is cheap, but that being said it doesn\'t cost much.
((((HUGS))))
Karl
This certainly speaks of someone in pain. And I pray there is someone who cares and recognizes it. IF not please yourself know this writing does make us scared and worried for you I claim. We can listen as well as talk....I know this is tough, & I have wondered myself if this is all there is left why am I even here? BUT I know too many people who care about me do not not want me to leave this earth until GOd calls me home himself.
Sadly, there is no one. I have no close friends because of having to move so often to find work and now I have been out of work for so long. The one chance I did have to return to work, I no longer have a car and there is no public transportation, where I live except for in town. It\'s one of those things you just have to live to understand. When things go wrong, they snoball so quickly. Bills behind, late fee\'s, tickets because I cannot afford to licence my car, even though I don\'t drive it and now I have to walk to the library to go online. When my husband passed, we were just getting ourselves where we could brathe a little easier. His funeral took everything I had in savings and most of what I made the following year and then the job was gone and since then I have felt like there is a chain around my neck dragging me deeper into a pit. I don\'t laugh or smile anymore, hell I cannot even cry anymore. I am so tired of hurting.....I am truly broken and pray each night, I will not see one more day.