Me

I think this is my last call for help before i have completely lost my mind. Currently all i am is mad at everything but i dont show not one bit of it at all. My eyes would be fire and people will see smiles because that all i can do is smile. Im tired of smiling tired of giving happy remarks when im completely pissed off at the world tired of sitting there thinking everything is all fine but its not. The smallest thing sets me off like a forest fire. Call me anything but once it hits my ears im on a rampage from the time i hear it to the time i bottle it up get my physical pains and put the smile everyone loves back on my face. I live with a father that doesnt care about anything but money and school. And a mother who doesnt care about anything but school and work. Im the youngest out of my family. Both brother and sister are in college asking for money out of the ass. While i sit home lookin at a wall doing nothing. Because i am to young for a job, to young to drive, to cold to walk, and to pissed off to see anyone. I can tolerate little but not much my friend who is gay wants to get touchy feely. I dont like hitting stuff because i dont know how hard i will hit it and how much damage i will do to it but more than likely i still do because i am so mad, i just have to. Im staying single because im afraid me getting pissed off at everything is dangerous for them. Ive seen to much done too many for  them to get worked up over me. Drama is another thing that always gets me mad even if im around the area that something is happening my name goes full force saying i did it to. NO i wasnt doing it to you were doing it and leave my name out your damn mouth! This is very hard for me to even write this Journal Entry because the whole time me writing this and getting to the end just gets me mad even more. I have more to write but thats all i can tolerate to write___-. Again this is my Call for Help!