feeling down
I'm trying to keep my head up. All I really want is to get in and see a gynecologist so they can tell me what to do. I keep telling myself not to google adenomyosis because all it's going to do is make me miserable and then I do it and it makes me miserable. I talked to my regular doctor once again and she agrees with me that the gyno was useless, she doesn't think I have PCOS she still thinks it's adenomyosis, (which he refused to even look into cuz he "couldn't do anything about it anyway"), but because she's just a free clinic doctor she can't help me. My only option is the medical school.
I just wish I had my baby girl here I wouldn't be so upset. I ALREADY HAD A FULL TERM PREGNANCY I shouldn't be freaking out being scared I'll never have a baby. I want to get pregnant but I'm so scared. I've been burned twice, and the way things are going with my boyfriend I don't think its the right time. I need him to be around to support me and he isn't ready for that. He's feeling sorry for himself because he wants a kid and I keep saying I need to see a doctor first and get healthy and he thinks I am making it all up. I wish he could have one of my hellish periods and see if he thinks I'm making it up. It's like my whole abdomen and back are radiating excruciating pain. I can't sit I can't stand I literally cry and stand then sit then switch positions every few seconds cuz the pain gets so bad.
I just want my daughter. She would be 3 years old in exactly one month and 3 minutes. f#@%. I wish there was a light switch in my head on nights like this that I could just flip and make it all go away, just for an hour until all these memories crawl back into whatever psychological cave they haunt.
**SCREAMS**PULLS HAIR**BREAKS PHONE**
I just wish I had my baby girl here I wouldn't be so upset. I ALREADY HAD A FULL TERM PREGNANCY I shouldn't be freaking out being scared I'll never have a baby. I want to get pregnant but I'm so scared. I've been burned twice, and the way things are going with my boyfriend I don't think its the right time. I need him to be around to support me and he isn't ready for that. He's feeling sorry for himself because he wants a kid and I keep saying I need to see a doctor first and get healthy and he thinks I am making it all up. I wish he could have one of my hellish periods and see if he thinks I'm making it up. It's like my whole abdomen and back are radiating excruciating pain. I can't sit I can't stand I literally cry and stand then sit then switch positions every few seconds cuz the pain gets so bad.
I just want my daughter. She would be 3 years old in exactly one month and 3 minutes. f#@%. I wish there was a light switch in my head on nights like this that I could just flip and make it all go away, just for an hour until all these memories crawl back into whatever psychological cave they haunt.
**SCREAMS**PULLS HAIR**BREAKS PHONE**
Replies
I think finding the right GYN is key. Our bodies are so intricately designed that if one piece is a little off, it\'s no good. Sort of like a foreign car... The key is finding the right things to make/keep your body healthy. I\'m currently doing a 3 month preconception detox and my body is responding positively.
Don\'t give up. Find the right doctor then advocate for yourself.
Xoxo
Nneka
I was just told I have adenomyosis after my rainbow\'s birth. My doctor reassured me that is very common and the only complication might be heavy periods and more painful cramping. I hope this can be reassuring to you. xoxo