Its just a game to him.I went to the office and spoke to my practice manager and she says she is sick of him talking to her about it as he never takes her advice anyway. He speaks to her about everything as well as the nurses he travels to Rockhampton and Mackay with and they are all sick of it.She says she has had patients complain that his mind is not on his job and to change surgeons. Another who says he lied to her. She thinks he does everything in his life as a distraction now so that he does not have to make his mind up about the direction he is heading and with who.Most importantly, she says he has trouble with his laptop and they found a cd in the drive and it has all pictures of he and slut in Singapore. He told me he had no pictures of her. He does not want to move home as he sits in his unit listening to her and his favourite music and pawing over pictures of her. Then he tells me he wants to be with me and wants his family and wants the kids and what we mean to him. And he screws me.It is just a game to him. Just a sick game.Our manager also says she sees him as out of control and it is only a matter of time before he has a bad mistake operating.What i Have to come to terms with is my fear that if he leaves me and goes to her he will settle down and be happy and none of this crap will bother him and all will be lovely for him without me. That is my fear. My big fear.I have to think though about who he has become, how he acts, how he thinks and how his logic works. For that will never change. What I find frustrating and sick in his logic and reason, so will she in time. His temper will not go when he is frustrated. that is him. He has lost his filters of decency. They have been gone for so long now, there is no way he will get them back. And he will be pissed at losing his money, and having to take a loan out to pay me out and not speaking to me and not speaking to his kids and having to see them at another venue rather than our house in Brisbane. I will insist that they have nothing to do with slut and that they call her by only that name. I hope it hurts him more than he has hurt me.He has been telling me he wants to be with me and telling me he wants to come home but telling everyone else that it is me who wants him home and he who does not want to come home. Sick. And nasty.And i looked at him on the couch last night and I hated him.