Day Six
Got a late start today because I stayed up too late last night. So far it's been a pretty good day. Yesterday my wife and i went around looking at antique shops and then went out to dinner, something we almost never do. These were simple things, but I was able to enjoy them. In earlier times in my life little things like that didn't affect me that much. I know that there were times when I simply went out and spent money to get a high out of it. I don't seem to need to do that anymore. Just going on a simple outing with no fixed goal is enough to satisfy me.
A thing that my wife and I like to do is talk about the possibility of selling out here and moving to Colorado. Colorado is a sort of golden dream for us because we've been out there many times and always enjoyed it very much. We like being outside, hiking in the mountains, and taking pictures of the scenery. We happen to live in a part of the country where the opportunities for getting out into nature are somewhat limited, and the summer climate also tends to discourage much in the way of outdoor activity. Sometimes I think the talking about such a move is as much fun or more than actually going. The move would take a lot of effort on our parts and we go back and forth about it. I also think that our negative job experiences in the town where we live has tended to sour us a bit on continuing to live here. I know that both of us would like to put all our past history behind us, and moving to another state would take us away from a place where we each have a lot of bad memories. Moving would be a big step, but I wonder sometimes if it would be a smart thing for us to do. We ask ourselves all the time if we couldn't find a way to be happy with what we have. At times those thoughts are like a pebble in our collective shoe. It's a thing that I'd like to figure out, but so far haven't been able to. I always wonder how much my depression affects my perspective on where and how I live. Being happy ought to be possible wherever you might be, but I haven't figured out just how to achieve that. Maybe it's a goal I should set for myself, once I'm feeling a little happier than I do now.
A thing that my wife and I like to do is talk about the possibility of selling out here and moving to Colorado. Colorado is a sort of golden dream for us because we've been out there many times and always enjoyed it very much. We like being outside, hiking in the mountains, and taking pictures of the scenery. We happen to live in a part of the country where the opportunities for getting out into nature are somewhat limited, and the summer climate also tends to discourage much in the way of outdoor activity. Sometimes I think the talking about such a move is as much fun or more than actually going. The move would take a lot of effort on our parts and we go back and forth about it. I also think that our negative job experiences in the town where we live has tended to sour us a bit on continuing to live here. I know that both of us would like to put all our past history behind us, and moving to another state would take us away from a place where we each have a lot of bad memories. Moving would be a big step, but I wonder sometimes if it would be a smart thing for us to do. We ask ourselves all the time if we couldn't find a way to be happy with what we have. At times those thoughts are like a pebble in our collective shoe. It's a thing that I'd like to figure out, but so far haven't been able to. I always wonder how much my depression affects my perspective on where and how I live. Being happy ought to be possible wherever you might be, but I haven't figured out just how to achieve that. Maybe it's a goal I should set for myself, once I'm feeling a little happier than I do now.
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