:(

So everyday goes by and I still don't know what is wrong with me. It is getting harder and harder to cope with and I am getting more and more uncomfortable by the day.

My doctor did a full panel of hormone blood work on me and everything came back pretty normal except for my testosterone being high. He finally ordered my thyroid antibodies test which I did on Thursday night and they should be back any day. I also had a thyroid ultrasound done Monday night and should know the results of these soon. If these come back normal I don't know what I am going to do anymore. My doctor mentioned Lyme disease as a possibility - so this could be a whole new road I venture on.

My eyes are getting worse by the day and work is just getting near impossible. I have this constant feeling of choking and like I am not getting enough oxygen and it is terrible. My original goal on here was to be diagnosed by October 22 so that I could enjoy my 1 year wedding anniversary with my husband (October 26) and enjoy Halloween. It doesn't look like I am going to meet my deadline.

My mom came up to see me for a week and help me with these doctors and these tests. Thank goodness my job is being so amazing with all of this - I would have fired myself by now. It has been nice to spend some time with my mother and let myself be babied again. We went to St. Patrick's in the city yesterday and it is the first time I went into that church and actually lit a candle for myself.

Sorry about all the venting. I'm just feeling beat down and defeated and I want my life back.