YIKES, YEEGADS and AWWWWW-GEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!I most humblyapologize from the bottom and with the whole of my missing-in-action heart!The rumors of my demise have been GREATLY exaggerated (as I am most decidedly NOT dead, nor am I "lost", woebegone, gone or anything else; and clearly I am NOT forgotten....... for which I am eternally grateful).I have, in actuality, only just recently escaped from the clutches of the evil chin Moondoggie's (that would be Luna ya'll) bastard brother who; along with his wicked pigmee henchmen, kidnapped me and spirited me away to the Pigmee Isle of Chin where they were holding me captive whilst waiting for Bear to pay my ransom........ Unfortunately, it takes some time to gather 2 tons of raisins (the ransom) and then there was the problem of how to ship them and the pigmees (pigwhose?????????) were peeved as Bernerd (Luna's evil bastard brother) had the nerve to ask for a ransom that doesn't agree with them...... In point-of-fact, the pigmee (pigyou?????) constitution (digestive system NOT mode of government as clearly they don't have a government being controlled as they are by Evil Bernerd) rejects completely any mention of raisins in all manner of horrible ways.......... (go ahead, let your imagination run wild!)On the Isle of Chin I have been forced to lay in the sun under the coconut trees (while secretly stashing the fallen coconuts in order to build a "Nut Raft" on which I could make my escape) while listening to the pigmees (pigwees???) practice acappella musicals which they hope will make them famous and give them a career on Broadway and thusly their freedom from Evil Bernerd........... Frankly, they are tone deaf and listening to them all day only made my escape more imperative. Luckily, my Sugarpuss sent Penelope the Virgin Queen on an airborne rescue mission to find me. Alas! She was delayed by a monsoon which is why it took her weeks, instead of days to find me. Her royal highness rested whilst I finished the Nut Raft escapevehicle and when all was completed to our satisfaction....... She took to the air and showed me the way home. I am happy to report that no pigmees (pigwhats????) were harmed in the making of our escape although Evil Bernard was quite frustrated to find that his plans had been thwarted.I returned to the arms of all my beloveds (okay, Luna has paws but you get the picture) where I am once again restored to my vibrant and vocal self. So be warned girls.........I'm coming to check up on you...............*off she goes to shower (ahhhhhhhhh the luxury of a shower!) and scrub off weeks and weeks of coconut oil and bad show tunes before feasting on Spam from a Can, cooked in a Pan and served with a Slam!*