I just have to say I really hate depression.  That said, the past week has sort have, I think and hope, a turning point.  After everything that has happened in the past week I feel like I'm starting to look again for the silver lining...not so much with this particular episode but with it being a part of my life journey in general. This past week is still too fresh in my head and overwhelming to really deal with that much.
I have been thinking, if it wasn't for my experiences with mental health so many many different aspects of my life would be so different.  I can't say if they would have been good, bad, better or worse, but they would have been different...and despite all the struggles I'm not sure I would want different.  Without depression and mental health struggles I wouldn't have met many of the wonderful people that are in my life today.  I might not have my apartment and I very likely would not have Ebby.  And while I don't like the area I live in much, or the low income, I get by and I do like my apartment and my fur-kid very much thank you.  I've met many people, and have some really good friends, that had it not been for various connections through mental health I'm not sure our paths would ever have crossed and I'm fairly certain we wouldn't be the good friends we are. I know without my experiences I wouldn't have the level of understanding and compassion that I have when I know others are struggling through similar things.  Because of my experiences I get to see things in a different light from what many people see.  I can see both the insiders and the outsiders perspective...maybe not always but more-so then if I was exclusively an outsider.
Depression and mental illness can be evil.  It is a thief that steals and destroys so much good but it does have it's silver linings.  There are good things that come out of the experiences.  I'm trying to look at those and not those big grey storm clouds that are looming overhead.