Today was an okay day.  Didn't take anything for sleep last night so was surprised I got any sleep but did manage some.  Didn't want to wake up though and even after I did wake up it took a lot to get anything accomplished....but I did!   I worked on some Christmas crafts that I have been wanting to do...not the ones I was going to gift everyone...I had to change my mind about that for this year.  Doing candy cane reindeer instead.  I'm so tired though that I can only do one or two and then need a break.  I opened up the package of candy canes and they were ALL broken but I still did a test one.  Realized I needed to go to the mall to get candy canes...well talk about insanity on a Saturday evening near Christmas...acckkk!  There were only really 3 stores I could go to that would even sell candy canes...the first one had two boxes left and they were more broken then the ones I had home...the second store i couldn't find any but the good ol' Dollarama had tons.  So I stocked up there. Also since I had to go to the mall I mailed some Christmas cards at the post office, still have a few more to send though.  And picked up some Boost supplements...my appetite has been pretty low since the med increase and I haven't been eating very healthily so I want to make sure I'm getting some of the right nutrients and figured I'd give a couple of them a try.  Got vanilla and chocolate.  The nutritionist I saw a few weeks ago suggested getting some anyway so I guess it doesn't hurt.   I'm invited to two different brunch's tomorrow at different times but not sure if I'll go or not.  Plus I'd like to go to church but one of them is at the same time...so I dunno.  Just going to head to bed and set my alarm and hopefully will feel up to doing something tomorrow.  I'm having a hard time being in social settings right now...just overwhelming...and I've got a lot of it coming up with the holidays so don't want to overdo it.  I hate it that I can't just go and enjoy these things...I can a little more when I'm not having problems with the depression and anxiety but it's a challenge even then.  I feel like I've spent so much time trying to just survive all the mental health stuff that I've becoming socially stunted and am so awkward and feel so immature when I'm around people my own age now.  I used to always feel like the mature one in the group and now I don't.  I don't know...I guess I'm just not a social person as it ends up being more awkward a lot of times then enjoyable.  I just feel socially retarded. I also notice I don't like the phone anymore.  I hate it when it rings so rarely have the volume turned on.  I basically will only talk to my immediate family on the phone with any sort of regularity and do any calls that I absolutely HAVE to do for appointments or whatnot...but other then that...I pretty much avoid it.  I'd rather write a letter and even that I struggle to do.  Well, gonna go head to bed and it's not even midnight yet.  LOL.  I've barely been on the computer today because I've just been too tired to look at the screen, my eyes really hurt today.  I feel a little down but overall not bad and I'm at least happy I got a few things accomplished.  There's been days where I wouldn't have been able to say that.