Had another busy day today.  It started early...even before my alarm went off.  Sleep wasn't terrible last night, I took 5mg of melatonin.  I fall asleep pretty easy with that if I don't take it too often.  However I wake up easy when I take it...so it's a bit of a trade off.  I woke up wide awake shortly after 3am and was about to get up but decided maybe I better look at the clock.  Sure enough...it was still time to be sleeping so I managed to doze off again.  Woke up a little before 6:30am and decided to stay up...since it was less then an hour to when I had to get up. It worked out and I still ended up rushing in the end.  That always happens.  I left my apartment shortly before 9am to go to my "big scary meeting".  It didn't end up being so big and scary after all.  I was mostly worried about what my Long Term Disability (LTD) rehabilitation specialist (not sure the correct title) would say.  But it went really well.  I finally feel like I have the right supports in my life to stay on the right track and make the transition to being a productive citizen again.  I had to share all the info I have been paper tracking the last few weeks and they were all very happy with how I am doing.  The  rehab specialist even said if there is ever anything I need or anything they can help with not to hesitate to ask.  I mentioned the possibility after volunteering for a bit of maybe taking a photography course or other artsy-crafty related course and she got very enthusiastic about it and was completely agreeable.  It turns out it's one of her interests as well.  :)  So that means, not only will they continue to find my psychology appointments and my occupational therapy appointments but there's a good likelyhood that they will cover the costs of any course/courses that maybe help build up routine and structure and get me out of the apartment.  That's exciting to me because finances are one of the biggest reasons I hold back from doing things I enjoy or want to learn about.   The other good thing is I got my application into the Salvation Army Thrift Store to start volunteering today.  Am aiming to start with 4-8 hours a week with the possibility of increasing that come the end of September or in October.  Every one I met with today at the meeting agreed that was the right amount of hours to start with and the goal if things go well to increase it they are very pleased with as well.  So, changes are in store.  :)  It's exciting, but it's a bit scary and anxiety producing to me too to be putting myself into these new situations.   It's been confirmed I will continue to be on LTD until at least sometime in the 2010 but that's okay because I'm making progress and feeling better then I have in probably years.  As hard as being off work has been and as hard as going through everything I've been through mental-health wise and physically I'm so thankful for it....it's been a huge blessing.  I really do feel that.  I think if I had continued to work, or stay in school, that it would take me a lot longer to get to were I am.  And I think that were I am, needed to happen, in order so that I can get to were God wants me to be.   So right now, even though I'm physically exhausted (I walked for like ever...probably at least 3-4 hours today, which doesn't sound like a lot but well, for me it is) I am a big ball of excited, nervous, happy, scared energy!  But mostly happy and excited!  :D