I can't seem to bring myself out of this depression that's consuming me lately. I know it got worse after seeing the psychologist the other day but I dealt with that. I know I was feeling more depressed then usual before that when I saw my pscyhiatrist but not as bad as I have been since the psychologist. I'm trying hard to get out of it but seems like the more I try the further down I fall. My roommate and I aren't fighting anymore but there's lots of tension. She's made her decision, I've made mine so now just have to put things into action. It's still a weekend so there is nothing I can do until tomorrow when offices open. I've tried sleeping, I've tried eating, I've tried being social, I've forced myself to do these things and have a shower despite having no energy. Breathing is a chore. The only good thing is I don't have any urges to self-harm and I'm not suicidal. Yes, I think about cutting and overdosing but more out of habit because it's what I'd normally do when I feel this way. I don't actually feel like doing it. I don't know why I have to feel this way but I guess there's a reason. I just have to wait and see and hope things don't get out of control.
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