man i was so blah when i wrote yesterday that i forgot to mention that i won a contest in the local newspaper here..it was a lexicon puzzle contest (cross between a wordsearch and a crossword).  I do them every now and then and mail them in.  Well while I was in hospital last weekend I ripped it out of the paper and filled it out and gave it to mom who mailed it for me.  They called yesterday to say I won $100 so that is awesome.  I am using half of it to get my hair done at the salon that I really like (my pre-Christmas treat to myself) and then I don't know yet about the rest.  It won't go far but it's money I didn't have and really could use especially with the holidays coming near.   i had a really hard time going to bed last night....i didn't take my sleeping meds and the anxiety built up so I ended up staying up.  Well my roommate woke up at 4am so after chatting for a bit I decided to take half an ativan and try to sleep.  It ended up not being such a big deal...still took a bit though but I was tired. My arms are still really sore from the IV's....I can't straighten out my left arm or hold a glass without it hurting...but my psychiatrist said (and I figured anyway) it's irritation from the trauma it was put through and that because of all that nerves that we don't normally feel are overactive right now.  I can tell it's the veins...when I am not paying attention and move a certain way I feel like my arms are bleeding...but it's just the blood in the veins.  It's really weird.  Anyway...it should settle in time.   I'm also feeling extremely tired, and nauseas today...the nausea I think is from the Manerix...it started right after I took it.  I'm also feeling blah and cranky and I don't think I'm going to spend much time on the computer.  I'm just too tired to look at the screen.