hmm...day 8...we'll see if the count continues as the day goes on... I have an appt today with the dentist which will take about 3 hours....that's more then the amount of time I slept (2.5 hrs).  That's with a maxed out dose of oxazepam.  And I haven't taken it the last few days in preperation for taking it last night.  :S After the dentist I need to go to the bank, go to the library, and get something for lunch...not sure what I'll treat myself to yet...except maybe coffee.  Gonna need that today, lol.  After that if I am feeling ok I told my friend, the one with the marital issues, that I may come over if I am not feeling too terrible...just for the afternoon.  We'll see...being there has the potential to be rather stressful and triggering.  But I also want to see their one week old (today) kittens.  Their cat got out and got preggos again while still breastfeeding the last litter.  They really need to get that cat fixed...lol...but in the meantime I want to see the babies.  Hehe.  Who can blame me.  :P  I'd like to take my camera to take some pics of them and of their 2.5 year old daughter Faith.  As active, and hyper, and loud as she gets I love her to death.  She always makes me smile with her cute way of doing things.  And she loves me to pieces.  Everytime I call, all I hear in the background is saying my name and begging for the phone.  Then I can't understand the conversation we have...lol...and then the other day when her mommy asked for the phone back, loud and clear as anything she says "no, I'm talking!" in her cute little 2 year old voice.  LOL.  It was so funny.  She just never wants to let me go.  I wish I had the energy to have her here for the afternoon or even overnight sometime.  But I just don't have it in me these days. Anyway...we'll see how today goes.  For only sleepy 2.5 hours I'm not feeling too terrible at the moment.  And so far no withdrawal but it took a couple days last time before I felt it.  I need to go eat my breakfast and take todays dose of the meds.  And write an email to my friend to let her know I'm still thinking of coming over but that I only had a little bit of sleep so may not be up to it but the time 2pm rolls around and I've gotten the things done that need to be done.  I would like to start on some Christmas shopping today too if I'm not too sleepy since I'll be downtown.  I love shopping downtown, it's such a different experience then the mall. Makes me feel like I'm a tourist.  :) Oh yeah...I actually read the bible before bed last night...didn't really seem to get much out of it...but I'm finding 2 Samuel a hard book to get into.  I think I read chapt 9 & 10 or something like that.  First time I've willingly read any since I was in hospital the first time.  I tried praying but that didn't work so well...my mind wandered onto not so great things while doing that...and kept getting upset, anxious, frustrated, and distracted....so I gave that up for the time being.  I think it's because i"m not quite ready to "let go and let God" as the saying goes.  I'm too stubborn for my own good...and I know it.