I meant to get back on here and write more last night but I just was so tired that I couldn't even really think or process enough to actually write...even after my nap.  I just needed to relax after everything that's gone on in the last week.   Overall I am feeling quite a bit better but I am not were I'd like to be yet.  I'm just taking it one day at a time right now.  I'm still struggling with my faith a bit but I am so thankful to God because I know if it weren't for Him I would not be here today.  I don't want to be a sideline Christian so to speak, but at the same time I'm not stressing out about how much or little time I am spending with my Heavenly Father.  I desire to know Him better and He knows that but at the same time I don't want to get so obsessed with it that I lose the whole point and end up turning away from Him in a few months time.  I want it to be a meaningful relationship that grows over time not something that I get sick of....like with a crush or something like that. I was going to write more last night about what came with my meeting with my rehab specialist through long-term disability.  It went really well and she is going to set up a couple things for me that may help me with getting some energy, becoming a bit more active, and help get me back on track towards volunteering and eventually returning to work.  Who knew that over 2 years ago when I went off work for a bit (was only suppose to be a few months) that I'd be off work this long.  I'm 26, I need to start being productive in society and life again and I don't want to let my lack of energy and mental and physical health get in the way any more then it already has.  I know I am capable so it's time to make some positive changes.  Anyway, the two biggest things that she is setting up is an occupational therapist to do some apptitude and interest testing and the other is a personal trainer to help motivate me to be a bit more active and build up some strength and energy.   Overall I am looking forward to these changes although admittedly I am a bit nervous.  But I think that is understandable.  We're hoping that within a month or so I will be able to start formally volunteering somewhere but we are leaving that open right now until I've been on my current medication dose a bit longer and make sure no further changes need to be made.     Today I am planning to spend at home and try to get some things accomplished around here.  I need to have a shower, make a phone call to try to get some info to apply for interest relief with my student loan, cut my nails (wow, they are getting crazy long), and I plan to spend at least 30 minutes cleaning my room (or unpacking)...hard to belief I still have unpacked boxes...I just don't know where to put anything and my room is a complete disaster...surprise, surprise.  The difference with my room here and my last place is that I'm hardly ever in my room here.  I sit in the living room which is as much my space as my roommate so it's comfortable and it's also bright and sunny in the living room because we still haven't got curtains up.  But I like it because I have a nice view of the blue sky and of the trees that's leaves are slowly starting to change color for the fall.  I keep the curtains in my bedroom closed so as to keep the room a bit cooler and so if I need a break from the bright sun or need some quiet alone time I can go in there and rest...but I mostly stay in the living room.  I also like to sometimes look out the window at the traffic and see what's happening out on the street.  Quite often there is something going on that is kind of interesting to observe.   Anyhow I am just sort of babbling now.  I'm feeling rather calm, with a slight edge of anxiety (who know's what that's about...probably just still settling down from the last while) but overall I am feeling positive and hopeful.  So that said, it is time to get a very late breakfast (it's noon now) and do something productive with my day.  Thank you to everyone for the comments and support, youi don't know how much it means.