I'm just getting ready to go get the bloodwork done but I am scared I don't want to even leave my apartment.  I feel like there is something really wrong with me but I don't know what and I don't know if I want to know.  I know I shouldn't be panicking....I'm just hungry and sore...and my blood count probably hasn't dropped any...so I just need to go and do this.  I've had bad pain around my left shoulder/neck/chest for the last couple days...I didn't mention it to them at the hospital because I figure it's just muscle strain from the way I been laying but it has been feeling worse and worse as time goes on and ibuprofen isn't helping at all.  I'm sorry, I don't mean to be complaining...I'm just really losing my mind and I'm so scared and anxious and I can't make my head shut up.  I'm also late on my meds because I don't know if I can take them when fasting for bloodwork and I can't ahold of my doctor to find out.  So I just gotta go and get this done.  Sorry for such a negative entry....I just need to vent to get it out of my head so I can hopefully actually get out of here and get this stuff done.  I wish I had someone who was able to go with me.  Oh well...I don't so I gotta face it and just go.  Please if you pray, pray for me today.