i'm feeling kind of awful right now...i'm swinging around a lot I don't know if it's BPD that i have...but maybe it's all spiritual warfare...I don't know...either way it still sucks... I feel like cutting...but tomorrow will make it 2 months since i last cut...I feel like I"m slipping and lossing the battle...i was thinking of the song Less like Scars by Sara Groves....and when she says looks less like scars and more like character....and the stupid thoughts that come into my head are gee...maybe you need a little more character (in other words...go cut)...it sounds stupid i know.  I don't want my life to be ruled by that.  I don't get it...things really aren't that bad....so why the heck am i feeling so crappy...i'm confused