2 hours of sleep doesn't cut it...but that's all i got.I had 2 appointments today...neither one of which were the one i needed...The first one was with my Rheumatologist...she want's me to see another Hematologist and is advising they do a bone marrow biopsy.  She said my bloodwork still shows the possiblity of Lupus but she isn't sure that's what it is since besides the messed up bloodwork there really isn't any other symptoms.  She doesn't like that my WBC's are so low...and have been for so long.  So just a bunch more stuff to add to the list of problems I'm having.Second was with my family doctor.  She just kept trying to convince me to go to the ER and request an admission.  I am so not doing that right now.  I told her as much.  I also was honest and told her I've been cutting...but I refused to show her the marks.  It's different when it is just lines....but this time around has been words too and I didn't want her to see them...I probably wouldn't have had a choice about the hospital if she saw them.  She tried to convince me she just wanted to see to make sure they're not infected and I said they aren't infected and I know what to watch for.  So I wasn't overly thrilled with the results of either appointment.Then I got home and found out my roommate is home early...asleep on the couch.  Usually that means she's sick.  I don't want her to be sick...but I was really looking forward to being alone in the place and not in my room.I left a message with my psychiatrist asking her what options I have that don't involve the ER if I don't feel I can hang on until my appointment with her next Wednesday...still waiting to hear back.