Crud
The lady who rudely had her kids cough and hack over us at Matthew's funeral...cough and hack over my IMMUNO-DEFICIENT child, called to tell me that the cold/flu/whatever it is has lasted over 3 weeks for them. Thank you. We needed that. We are all still sick...Sophia is especially MISERABLE.
As luck would have it, AF came to visit me for the second time since we lost Matthew and it hit with a VENGEANCE!! I hurt from head to toe!
My DH and I have ANOTHER argument going...this time over Matthew's Headstone. Nice thing to haggle about. I sent him a draft of an online design I made for his Headstone with:
Matthew Christopher
Born into the arms of Jesus
Friday, September 3, 2010
“Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you
Before you were born, I set you apart.”
Jeremiah 1:5
Resting here with Matthew are memorial items for
More than 200 babies lost in pregnancy
We get to have a full size headstone because they are actually starting a NEW SECTION in the cemetery for babies lost in pregnancy! Matthew will be the first one! They are choosing a special statue for this section, which we get to weigh in on...which is sweet. Anyhow, it is a full size, black granite slab w/an image of a baby in hands and looks quite elegant...BUT....DH decided that the mention of the OTHER babies needs to come BEFORE MATTHEW'S NAME!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!
He said it will be "expected" by all the families who memorialized their babies with Matthew. MALARKEY!! I asked several of them for suggestions on verbiage for the headstone and NOT A SINGLE ONE even mentioned memorial items, which we are DEFINITELY mentioning...but I will NOT do it BEFORE THE NAME OF OUR SON, WHOSE BODY WILL BE BURIED THERE!!!!
I think the stress of not working is making him lose it. He was so rude about this...he has NEVER treated me like he has lately. I guess we are both very different since losing Matthew...and DH has lost more than I have, as he identified himself through his executive level job. It defined him professionally and as a provider, and he is looking for ways to exert himself here that are not appropriate.
My DD and I cried as my DH went on about how I never should have opened it up to other people for their grief if I was going to be so selfish. My DD said it was her brother's grave, and she wanted to see his name before the babies who were not IN THERE with Matthew. Argh. I finally just said that maybe he should show us what he had in mind, and that we could all pray on it and sleep on it...and talk about it when we are all feeling better.
I'm losing it. Too much crud. Everything is on hold for diagnosing Sophia because of my rude friend and her SICK children. So, Sophia suffers away...
Oh...and her post nasal drip leads to vomiting...so when my DH put her in bed with us at 3 am because we were both exhausted and she couldn't stop coughing...she gagged and turned her head to PUKE all over me...and the pillows (SOAKING INTO THE PILLOWS THROUGH THE DOUBLE CASES) and all over our bedding. Did I mention we were already exhausted...and sick? This is when the bar dropped REALLY low on what was acceptably clean in the moment. We changed bedding and jammies and used washcloths to clean up, but showers and her bath waited another fitful, cough-filled 4 hours...which meant yet ANOTHER linen change. LOL I wasn't thinking too clearly on that one.
So, after all my whining and complaining....I am definitely hanging my head in shame that my problems feel so heavy to me right now, when there is the heartbreaking story of Katie and Becca...it puts everything in perspective. What really matters are those whom we love and we need to cherish every second we get with them!!! Every second of every pregnancy...every precious moment.
Praying for their family....
As luck would have it, AF came to visit me for the second time since we lost Matthew and it hit with a VENGEANCE!! I hurt from head to toe!
My DH and I have ANOTHER argument going...this time over Matthew's Headstone. Nice thing to haggle about. I sent him a draft of an online design I made for his Headstone with:
Matthew Christopher
Born into the arms of Jesus
Friday, September 3, 2010
“Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you
Before you were born, I set you apart.”
Jeremiah 1:5
Resting here with Matthew are memorial items for
More than 200 babies lost in pregnancy
We get to have a full size headstone because they are actually starting a NEW SECTION in the cemetery for babies lost in pregnancy! Matthew will be the first one! They are choosing a special statue for this section, which we get to weigh in on...which is sweet. Anyhow, it is a full size, black granite slab w/an image of a baby in hands and looks quite elegant...BUT....DH decided that the mention of the OTHER babies needs to come BEFORE MATTHEW'S NAME!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!
He said it will be "expected" by all the families who memorialized their babies with Matthew. MALARKEY!! I asked several of them for suggestions on verbiage for the headstone and NOT A SINGLE ONE even mentioned memorial items, which we are DEFINITELY mentioning...but I will NOT do it BEFORE THE NAME OF OUR SON, WHOSE BODY WILL BE BURIED THERE!!!!
I think the stress of not working is making him lose it. He was so rude about this...he has NEVER treated me like he has lately. I guess we are both very different since losing Matthew...and DH has lost more than I have, as he identified himself through his executive level job. It defined him professionally and as a provider, and he is looking for ways to exert himself here that are not appropriate.
My DD and I cried as my DH went on about how I never should have opened it up to other people for their grief if I was going to be so selfish. My DD said it was her brother's grave, and she wanted to see his name before the babies who were not IN THERE with Matthew. Argh. I finally just said that maybe he should show us what he had in mind, and that we could all pray on it and sleep on it...and talk about it when we are all feeling better.
I'm losing it. Too much crud. Everything is on hold for diagnosing Sophia because of my rude friend and her SICK children. So, Sophia suffers away...
Oh...and her post nasal drip leads to vomiting...so when my DH put her in bed with us at 3 am because we were both exhausted and she couldn't stop coughing...she gagged and turned her head to PUKE all over me...and the pillows (SOAKING INTO THE PILLOWS THROUGH THE DOUBLE CASES) and all over our bedding. Did I mention we were already exhausted...and sick? This is when the bar dropped REALLY low on what was acceptably clean in the moment. We changed bedding and jammies and used washcloths to clean up, but showers and her bath waited another fitful, cough-filled 4 hours...which meant yet ANOTHER linen change. LOL I wasn't thinking too clearly on that one.
So, after all my whining and complaining....I am definitely hanging my head in shame that my problems feel so heavy to me right now, when there is the heartbreaking story of Katie and Becca...it puts everything in perspective. What really matters are those whom we love and we need to cherish every second we get with them!!! Every second of every pregnancy...every precious moment.
Praying for their family....
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