I am unpacking boxes today. Still nowhere near done. I came across this box that tore my heart right out of my chest. I know this for sure because my chest hurt so bad I was having trouble breathing. I'm inclined now to believe all of the chest pain issue is about stress. I have a coating and a taste in my mouth that causes me to think maybe I'm rotten. I'm home alone and the cats won't even come near me. Mom's gone off her rocker. So back to the box. No, not so fast. When Jeff passed my husband gave me a footlocker to put his stuff in that I wanted to keep forever. Of course it is overstuffed, goes without saying. One more piece of paper will not fit. Sometimes I run across something and put it in anyway. Today I ran across a box that I did not pack. Here is a list if what was in it. Jeff's address bookMedical records from when he had mono.Psyche eval from when he got dpressed. (girlfriend left him)(transplant issues)Funeral Home papersObituaryMore notes written while intubatedFuneral propagandaEvery piece of mail he has recieved since he passedOther personal papers taken from his room. His stuff. I wasn't ready for this. Someone has been keeping this box. I appreciate it. It almost killed me. If someone were going to keep this box without my knowing, knowing what happenns to me when I find stuff like this, why did they leave it where I had to find it? OK. I'm calming down now. I'm going to jump into the beautiful jacuzzi bathtub and melt. I'm not taking the ativan for this. I don't want to be a slave to a med.