We had a great holiday season and it was a calm and peaceful school vacation.  It is not often that can be said so I am grateful for it.  Someone asked me what Santa brought me and I said peace and tranquility because it was true. The worst of the grief seems to have passed although there are still moments in time when it hits but now I let it come instead of fighting it and that seems to help.  The kids are finally talking and asking questions about their Dad and we can talk about him in a way that doesn't cut like a knife.  I told my 12 year old son that I will always be grateful to his Dad and love him for giving me three great children to raise and love for my whole life. At church a few weeks ago the pastor was talking about the fact that people come into our lives for a season and then the season passes and new things come into our lives.  It was a good message because in my case it seems to be true.  I want to be open to the next step in life and enjoy it instead of having a constant pity party.  It is definitely more fun to be that way and I notice such a change in the kids when I am better. A while ago I talked about life being a blank page and I am starting to write more of my story and it is getting better.  There are no tears to blur the page and I can think of him and smile.  Time to put the bad part away where it belongs.  I know I have more work to do for me and I am willing to do it.  I will give my faith feet!