I Give Up!
I know I haven't wriiten for quite some time, but today I need to vent. I've been dealing with life the best I can, with things going along OK. Winter is ending, which I'm very happy about, but at the same time I've have very sad thoughts. I think this is because the 1 year anniversary of Chuck dying is approaching and this time last year was a very, very sad emotional time. Hopefully, once the day passes, those feelings will lessen.
Some days I just feel so alone. My sons have their own lives, so I don't see them too much. Unless I call them, they don't call to talk with me or see how I am. Guess they figure "good "ol Mom is OK." I have no other family here, so here I am alone in my house. I do go to work a couple of times a week, which is good. I'm not a group person, so haven't joined any groups.
The next issue which makes me want to give up is my health issues. I saw my Dr. yesterday for a checkup. I've been trying to lose weight for many years, unsuccessfully. I try to eat healthy, because I'm diabetic. He never is happy with test results, wanting them to be better. He doesn't seem to care that the past year hasn't been the easiest year in my life. Now I have another health worry. Apparently my liver function enzymes were extremely elevated. He feel that I have gallbladder disease. Yes, I've had some symptoms, but those symptoms don't really match what one can experience. So, now I have to have an ultrasound, and possibly surgery. This is something else to cope with and deal with. Why can't I just be left alone?
I give up! I'm tired of fighting. I wouldn't do anything, but I just don't care anymore.
Some days I just feel so alone. My sons have their own lives, so I don't see them too much. Unless I call them, they don't call to talk with me or see how I am. Guess they figure "good "ol Mom is OK." I have no other family here, so here I am alone in my house. I do go to work a couple of times a week, which is good. I'm not a group person, so haven't joined any groups.
The next issue which makes me want to give up is my health issues. I saw my Dr. yesterday for a checkup. I've been trying to lose weight for many years, unsuccessfully. I try to eat healthy, because I'm diabetic. He never is happy with test results, wanting them to be better. He doesn't seem to care that the past year hasn't been the easiest year in my life. Now I have another health worry. Apparently my liver function enzymes were extremely elevated. He feel that I have gallbladder disease. Yes, I've had some symptoms, but those symptoms don't really match what one can experience. So, now I have to have an ultrasound, and possibly surgery. This is something else to cope with and deal with. Why can't I just be left alone?
I give up! I'm tired of fighting. I wouldn't do anything, but I just don't care anymore.
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