I talked to my therapist yesterday, and we concluded why my anger has been coming out in the past month, since I wasn't able to financially have counseling.  The reason is because of the inability to forgive my parents as well as OCC for kicking me out a few years back.  A lot has happened in the past month that I haven't had much of a chance to write about on here, but hope to in the next few days.The assignment she gave me was to write down a list of all the ways I can remember that I have been hurt by the people that come in mind and for each situation write down how I felt then ask God for the truth that He wants me to live my life now.  Here it goes:1.  Rape-  I felt dirty, shameful, guilty, no trust in anyone, hated my body, felt the police supported the abuser, judged, statistic, no one cared for me, and wanted my abuser dead as well as myself.2.  Physical Abuse-  I felt like it was all my fault, wanted to be dead, shameful, no one to trust, hated my body, and depressed.3.  Verbal Abuse-  I felt guilty, shameful, wanted to be dead, and that no one cared for me.4.  Abandonment-  I felt like I was put on the back burner, not a priority, and guilty that it was all my fault.5.  Pride-  I felt stupid.6.  Money-  I felt poor because the person put money before me due to their lack of priorities.7.  Lies-  I felt I could not trust anyone, and that it was all my fault.8.  Gossip-  I felt that I couldn't tell that person anything because it could spread around like wildfire due to a lack of trust.9.  Those who broke confidentiality-  I felt that I could not trust that individual because of their lack of obeying the law and God as well as could not follow their example for future practice.10.  Manipulation-  I felt I could not trust anyone because they will try to take advantage of me for their own selfish gain.11.  Witholding of love-  I did not feel loved but betrayed because of me being a woman.12.  Lack of Responsiblity- I felt that the person was unable to take care of themselves, and needed constant guidance, when in reality they know how to take care of themselves, but have a terrible memory.13.  Lack of Consistency/Structure-  I felt that the person had no idea what they were doing, and desperately needed help or did not care about me to plan out their lessons or work day accordingly.14.  Namecalling-  I felt stupid, guilty, shameful, and that no one cared for me.15.  Bullied-  I felt insignificant, wanted to die, shameful, guilty, and could not trust that person.This was hard.  Maybe tomorrow I will do part two.  This is a lot to soak in.Blessings!