Today is the one month anniversary of Sarah's death. How did that month pass so quickly? Where have I been? It's so difficult to tell others who haven't heard the news about Sarah's death. To actually have to say those words out loud is to make it real. It was Good Friday morning at about 5:30 am that we got the phone call saying that Sarah was in the emergency room in Minneapolis and had then been transferred to the intensive care unit in another hospital across the river.
Sarah had been having some breathing issues since last June. She had been having testing to determine whether it was asthma or something else. We have never received a definitive diagnosis, but she was on several different medications. Sarah was not responding to the medications she had at home and she was having some pain in her side, as though she had pulled a muscle from coughing so much.She took a tylenol, which did no good and then later an advil, which made her nauseous. Her boyfriend Ryan took her to the emergency room early Friday morning morning, about 1:45am. She had to go into the ER or urgent care a couple of other times when her condition got really bad. When ever she had a chest Xray done, the results were always clear, even though she was coughing up a lot of mucus.

Replies

Jhelum
Jhelum

I am sorry you had to see this day. I know too well how the one month mark was for me, don\'t even want to remember that. My mom passed away of aneurysm too. She was also coughing real bad, had taken a cough syrup and I don\'t really know if that has a connection or not. I wish I could go back and change everything, for all of us.
This weekend is tough, for you and for me. But we\'ll pull through together. Take care sweetheart...
biowoman
biowoman

Time is a strange thing following the loss of a child. Sometimes it seems like time stands still...and other times it rushes by...whichever...it is a blur. The early months are so difficult...the pain so raw...every thought of your child...it is unbelievable...incomprehensible...physical heartache...but all this is normal...and somehow your spirit will carry you through. The human spririt is amazing...it keeps pulling you along when you think you cannot. Be gentle on yourself...take things as easy as you can...grief takes up a lot of your energy. I am so glad that you are writing in your journal. It has helped me so much...just to talk. Love to you...Karen
annsullivan
annsullivan

A hard part for me was to realize life does continue...how could everyone not know the tremendous pain I was in. Tomorrow will be 4 long years for me - I can\'t believe I just wrote that. Hugs to you, Ann