Such a shitty day. well, it was good and it was bad.I found some really intersting stuff on the net about the proper vitamins to get off of booze, so thats a good thing, cause its a fight for me. Lots of vitamin C, b complex, etc, any of us can find it on the net.and I had to go to my lawyers office, to pick up my papers, all the case files from when I tried to get my divorce. So, I got all that, and found out that I still dont have my divorce, after all these years....and its been so many!!!! and yet, I still dont have my divorce.Am I to be stuck with this ass hole for the rest of my life????I picked up my files, and went out to my car, and just sat there and cried....I just dont understand it. He cant afford any better lawyer than I can, so how come he wins?I hate him. I want my divorce, and I want him to pay child support, and he wont. He is even going to court this month, to try to get out of it.What a loser. he has never even paid it.I ask God all the time, to make things work for us, but still, all I hear, is be careful about what you pray for, well, I call bullshit, that man hasnt paid child support, he has taken everything out of his name, and he ignores his son. and with the court system the way it is, he WILL get away with it.This stuff sucks.But....I am NOT going to let him get to me anymore, I am going to be sober, and strong, and show him what life is all about. I really dont know what else I can do. I know I can go back to legal aide, ( maybe) and hire my lawyer back, but if she couldnt get it the first time...how is she going to get it the next? Plus, I had applied for a divorce almost ten years ago, and still dont have it.....I just dont understand. how can the law let him keep me tied to him like this?he is such an asshole.   Why wont the divorce go through? Is it because I only have a Legal Aide lawyer? is that what it s all about?I am pretty frustrated....so much in fact, that the folder I got from my lawyer today, is still in the trunk of my car.her secretary asked me if I wanted his picture back, omg, they actually keep that separate from the file . lol I said, yeah, I will take it, only because its my sons father. but now my son hates him too.oh well, shit happens, and we keep on going eh?