Lost

I dont know what to do.  My boyfriend is leaving I have panic attacks and I have no answers about the future.  
The last time I suffered prom panic attacks Jesus was the only one who helped me.  They went away for 5 years.  Now they are back.  I am at a point in my life where things are very unstable and I have to make big decisions.  
My boyfriend was going to propose to me before he left so that I would know that things would be alright and we would still be togther.  I cant have him do that though cause as much as I love him he wont talk about his relationship with God and I want a marriage where God is the center.  I dont wanna marry someone who doesnt believe cause we have problems now that will only make it worse.  
I dont know what to do.  Do I give up my dream of an ideal marriage and life for someone I only get along with half the time or do I wait and maybe find love again.
Ending things is so hard and I dont know if I can do it.  Going from possibly marriage to nothing is a horrible decision to have to make.  And to have my mind clouded with anxiety and guilt for being with someone God may not approve of.  It is just too much.