Well I am filling out job entries everyday.  I hope that I will get a job soon.  It will help me to feel more secure, and I know I must start to support myself again.  I am starting to feel foolish for hoping that I will find a mate.  It just doesn't seem to be in the cards for me.  I really love my nephews.  I tease my sister in law that I wanted a niece too.  When I mentioned adopting a baby girl my nephew said he would rather I have my own.  It about broke my heart.  I may not have a mate to share my life, but I know if nothing else I have my parents, and my brother's family.