not sure

rough week. busy head. car was stolen major stress. daughter started counceling and also started reading my ds journals and postings so little lost as to how to vent. am going to councelor with her this wednesday. when not with her pretty much working myself crazy. im wiped out her physically but not mentally. my kids are my everything and im scared. said some hurtful things to a friend because im hurting and jealous but she has been there so she knows how i feel to have lost me. its like we live in this imaginary would of online madness. i just want reality sometimes but cant deal with intense emotions they overwhelm me and i act like an ass when i let heaven walk away because of my fears. i would love to love myself so i can let someone good enter my life.