Why

Why do I do stupid things?
I just read back the 76 emails between the N and I from Sept 16, 2009.  He went through quite possibly every human emotion in that day.  He pulled every N trick in the book that day, and in all my responses all I did was keep trying to comfort him and keep things under control.  The whole day was absolute chaos.  I was so firmly caught up in his web of insanity.  WTH did I read those today, why am I keeping myself energetically connected to him when we haven't spoken in over 8 months. 
I just want to erase him from my mind and my heart.  Instead i just keep prolonging the pain, hurt, confusion, disappointment, fear, heartbreak and bewilderment. 
Let it go, Harmonytwin....just let it....go.  Please...