Confused

Ok so a year ago today we moved to texas with my job and it just seems like that's where everything went down hill.. this is where I had and loss Journee,.... but I dont know here lately it seems like my body is reliving the pregnancy beginning this point..I know I'm not pregnant,.. I can only wish but I know I'm not.. but i feel like I am .... by boobs are getting full and lately milk been coming in.. i been dieting and loosing weight but this pass week i been eating like crazy, not dieting eating whatever and i still lost 2 pounds.. all i do is eat and sleep... and my tummy feels so queezy.. i dont know if im doing this to myself.. maybe me reading everyone conceiving again is making me depressed to where im acting like im pregnant.. i dont know whats happening and i cant control it.. I dont want to test because i know im not and i dont want to play these emotional games.. maybe because journee year is approaching I'm reliving it i can remember everything that happened a year ago today.... from when i got to texas.... i dont know i dont like this feeling and i want it to stop..... my body acting pregnant is torture for me because i know nothing is coming out.. why is this happening this is horrible... maybe i should stay off here for a while maybe everyone being pregnant is getting to me..... maybe im more messed up than i thought.. just maybe everything..............