thank you
The house is very quiet this morning as I dring my third cup of coffee. Steve is sleeping and I am concerned about him. But I have been that way for a long time now. The cancer is growing and it has been stable for so long. I am grateful that I have each of you to pour my heart out to. I would be lying if I told you I was not afraid. My faith is strong, maybe not strong enough. The Bible tells us not to worry, I know death will come in God's timing. Mine and Steve's. So why am I doing the worrying thing?
He is concerned, not afraid. He comes to bed later than me most every night. He always wakes me up and I can tell that is when he is most tense. He tells me over and over that he loves me and I know that he is nervous. I usually rub his back until he drops off to sleep. I don't worry about finances because he has provided for me, I don't worry about the here after because I know we will go to heaven. I worry about being so alone. I have children who love me and a church that will support me. I have many friends around me. I have all of you, who I depend on daily. So why do I let myself get a little crazy like I am this morning. The unknown is a scary thought. Forgive me if I am such a downer today!!
On a much lighter note I had a wonderful phone call last night. It was from my good friend Carol. Most of you know that she lost her dear husband Art last year and she is such an inspiration to all of us. I was so happy to put a voice with that wonderful supportive cyber friend. We are getting together with Linda and Ingrid this fall. It will be a time of joy and reflection for all of us. I would love to meet so many of you. Maybe one day. As my Day would say "Lord willing and the creek don't rise". Funny how we remember some of the things our parents use to say. Carol laughed a little at my southern accent. I don't think I have one, but yall know what I mean.
I send my love to each and every person reading this. I am praying for you all and please remember my baby Steve. All 250 pounds of him!!
Love and prayers,
Wanda
He is concerned, not afraid. He comes to bed later than me most every night. He always wakes me up and I can tell that is when he is most tense. He tells me over and over that he loves me and I know that he is nervous. I usually rub his back until he drops off to sleep. I don't worry about finances because he has provided for me, I don't worry about the here after because I know we will go to heaven. I worry about being so alone. I have children who love me and a church that will support me. I have many friends around me. I have all of you, who I depend on daily. So why do I let myself get a little crazy like I am this morning. The unknown is a scary thought. Forgive me if I am such a downer today!!
On a much lighter note I had a wonderful phone call last night. It was from my good friend Carol. Most of you know that she lost her dear husband Art last year and she is such an inspiration to all of us. I was so happy to put a voice with that wonderful supportive cyber friend. We are getting together with Linda and Ingrid this fall. It will be a time of joy and reflection for all of us. I would love to meet so many of you. Maybe one day. As my Day would say "Lord willing and the creek don't rise". Funny how we remember some of the things our parents use to say. Carol laughed a little at my southern accent. I don't think I have one, but yall know what I mean.
I send my love to each and every person reading this. I am praying for you all and please remember my baby Steve. All 250 pounds of him!!
Love and prayers,
Wanda
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