In the past when ever I have left him, i know at what point i have to contact him, just in case he still wants me. I get this anxious feeling in the stomach and i know that " have been a bad girl" so i must contact him. Its almost like i let myself do what i know is the wrong thing. The most I have ever been gone has been maybe 6-8 weeks. Right now I am in the action stage and i want to get through this so i don't have to deal with him anymore. Actually, it feels nice not to have dealt with him in the last month. I feel great and at peace most of the time. So, why am i even contemplating and questioning my actions.