Numb is what i feel in my heart and soul. I have four days off with nothing to do but think. So my plan will be to finish my book The Best Awful, then go to the book store and read more. Try to sleep most of my time off and spend time making a plan for the next 3 months. I need to stay afloat. I must remember my goals and my decisions and they why's. I must find a way to stay strong. Right now I must concentrate on healing myself from the inside out. Concentrate on me for a while and stay calm and quite. There will be time for play and frolick in the spring.