Long time since I've checked in. My last MRI in Dec.07 showed all brain lesions and spinal except for one were gone!!! Thank you Avonex,exercise, eating good food!!!! Because my depression was worsening and the weely shots were just too hard for me, my doctor switched me to Tysabri. Only had 2 infusions so far, can't really tell yet whats going on other than getting side effects of flu again both times, I know its doin' somethin'.I love that river of denial.  I was feeling better and didnt want to accept MS. My ex husband and I were close friends after the divorce pain subsided. Then he hung himself on NYrs Eve this year. I went back to smoking ahain. He has really pissed me off by doin that!!!! I get tired of life too, but I don't want to hurt those left the way he did. I hope he has found the relief he needs. The bitter cold snaps we have had has intensified the spasticity in my fanny, legs and feet. Reminding me that I am lucky to be walking again, yet,  will I ever feel normal again. Over a year now with a numb crotch, butt, and feet. I don't let my boyfriend know that sex just doesnt do much for  me anymore because he would probably dump me for that. He's getting old too and loves that stupid Viagra. Bull!!!!! Why do guys think their genitals define a man? Who cares????   anyway, I am rambling here. God to be back. Gone too long. Looking up familiar names but not finding them either. Hope they are doing so well that they dont need this site anymore.  But I have MS and I have to accept it. I am not MS just because I have it.