blah!!!!

I am trying so hard to remain positive about things, it is just sooooo hard when I am in so much pain. Then this morning I woke up and was actually feeling good, got all excited, then after I dropped my son off at school the dull ache started and now I am in agony, I just got sick a few minutes ago from it, but I hate taking pills at work cause I can't function and I have to fight to stay awake. I have a feeling I am going to have no choice but to take something.I did talk to Justin last night about things and I think I am just being overly sensative and emotional, but who wouldn't be when they are in constant pain and just so unsure about stuff. I just know he loves me and I love him so that is all that matters.I honestly do not know how I am so sane right now other than having the constant support from my mom and dad, justin, and all of my friends (esp. all the ladies on here). This web site has been so great, I really don't know how I managed before I got on here, so much easier knowing I am not alone.Work today is horrible so that just makes me want to go home and get into bed even more. I swear if I could just sleep 24/7 I would be happy. I am always so freaken tired, I slept so good last night and  yet I feel as though I could fall asleep right now, that is why I don not like to take pills just makes me even more tired. So just like the title on this entry   BLAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!