Wondering....?
Well it's been a while...
ya know they say that absent makes the heart grow funder... with me.. I tend to get the feelin of being Forgotten.. yeppers.. in this online world if you can't keep up you just get left behind playin with ya Keyboard...
Nice thing is it's About Spring.. yeppers sun is shinin here in WI... and I'm out riding around on my three wheel bicycle.. It's nice.. cause I get some exercise.. feel the wind in my face..brings joy to my soul.. and I see other folks smiling and laughing and pointing at the Fat guy on a three wheel bicycle..
i can't really much blame em... I and see my shadow chasin me.. and frankly.... it aint all that pretty...
I can't help but wonder how I got into this shape.. I've tried dieting.. cutting down on portions.. i eat a salt free fat free diet .. i avoid the Buffets.. boy I hate havin to pass up good food... you rreally dont' have to pass it up... but hey..seem like one chickin legg is just as bad for me as the whole darn chickin... (baw- caw)
Real dam funny part of my life is the ladys on Plenty of Fish.. boy whatta hoot...\
I'm honest about my disabilites..and my hearing.. and i get tossed back faster than Charlie Tuna ...(the starkiss tuna guy)
So hey how ya tune a fish anyway....?
Well I may not be online as much as I use too... but gee I'm tryin to get a life outside my liven room.. sure as heck wish I could get a job.. even a parttimer would be great... but lately I can't stand of walk more than a couple of minutes.. i did the grocery store yesterday.. pushin a cart.. boy sure am glad the manager put them benches out for use disable old farts... i hit every one I could find.. huffin and puffin.. and well hey that be the story of my life..
them doctors tell me do this and do that.. but it aint as easy as they seem to think...my mom and her mom both had this problem.. all three of us have difficulty walking after we hit the age of 55... yepp our butts are all about the same size too.. but my butt weights a lot more than mom's.. or grandma's.. well mom hit 400 pounds.. me I almost made it to 500... no yoke..
I lost over a 100 pounds and gained half that back..
as you can tell I'm not all too happy with myself..
overweight and underloved.. alone and angry ... constant pain is relentless..
day in and day out.. if I take pain meds I get moody and my mouth lately has takin on a real mean streak... stuff flys outta there like bats outta cave.. at nite....I feel like I'm loosin control.. the only thing I've ever had in my life was self control.... really I was so pround of it.. I ended the abusive pattern of my grandmother and mom.. only now to be beattin down by the pain.
I got a new little twix too... when I get excited.. (ya know like have to have an interview with them food stamp folks or the city folks for housin) MY that's a bugger.. my mind becomes befuddled and mixed up ... I can't think straight.. and I get angry.. and sometimes my mouth shoots off.. one that really set me off is proving I"m an American Citizen... After all the years of payin taxes and being a law abiding citizen.. I gotta prove I"m an American Citizen.. Jeesh just chaps my HIDE>>>>!
well that be what goin on in my little world... I'm kinda Scared.. feel like I don't belong here on this planet any more..
I haven't felt this unwelcome since I was a child living with my Grandmother..I never felt welcome in her home.. although i was forced to live there for twelve years of my childhood...
well gonna go oil up the old bike chain.. might be back I don't know..
best wishes and many blessings...
Russ
ya know they say that absent makes the heart grow funder... with me.. I tend to get the feelin of being Forgotten.. yeppers.. in this online world if you can't keep up you just get left behind playin with ya Keyboard...
Nice thing is it's About Spring.. yeppers sun is shinin here in WI... and I'm out riding around on my three wheel bicycle.. It's nice.. cause I get some exercise.. feel the wind in my face..brings joy to my soul.. and I see other folks smiling and laughing and pointing at the Fat guy on a three wheel bicycle..
i can't really much blame em... I and see my shadow chasin me.. and frankly.... it aint all that pretty...
I can't help but wonder how I got into this shape.. I've tried dieting.. cutting down on portions.. i eat a salt free fat free diet .. i avoid the Buffets.. boy I hate havin to pass up good food... you rreally dont' have to pass it up... but hey..seem like one chickin legg is just as bad for me as the whole darn chickin... (baw- caw)
Real dam funny part of my life is the ladys on Plenty of Fish.. boy whatta hoot...\
I'm honest about my disabilites..and my hearing.. and i get tossed back faster than Charlie Tuna ...(the starkiss tuna guy)
So hey how ya tune a fish anyway....?
Well I may not be online as much as I use too... but gee I'm tryin to get a life outside my liven room.. sure as heck wish I could get a job.. even a parttimer would be great... but lately I can't stand of walk more than a couple of minutes.. i did the grocery store yesterday.. pushin a cart.. boy sure am glad the manager put them benches out for use disable old farts... i hit every one I could find.. huffin and puffin.. and well hey that be the story of my life..
them doctors tell me do this and do that.. but it aint as easy as they seem to think...my mom and her mom both had this problem.. all three of us have difficulty walking after we hit the age of 55... yepp our butts are all about the same size too.. but my butt weights a lot more than mom's.. or grandma's.. well mom hit 400 pounds.. me I almost made it to 500... no yoke..
I lost over a 100 pounds and gained half that back..
as you can tell I'm not all too happy with myself..
overweight and underloved.. alone and angry ... constant pain is relentless..
day in and day out.. if I take pain meds I get moody and my mouth lately has takin on a real mean streak... stuff flys outta there like bats outta cave.. at nite....I feel like I'm loosin control.. the only thing I've ever had in my life was self control.... really I was so pround of it.. I ended the abusive pattern of my grandmother and mom.. only now to be beattin down by the pain.
I got a new little twix too... when I get excited.. (ya know like have to have an interview with them food stamp folks or the city folks for housin) MY that's a bugger.. my mind becomes befuddled and mixed up ... I can't think straight.. and I get angry.. and sometimes my mouth shoots off.. one that really set me off is proving I"m an American Citizen... After all the years of payin taxes and being a law abiding citizen.. I gotta prove I"m an American Citizen.. Jeesh just chaps my HIDE>>>>!
well that be what goin on in my little world... I'm kinda Scared.. feel like I don't belong here on this planet any more..
I haven't felt this unwelcome since I was a child living with my Grandmother..I never felt welcome in her home.. although i was forced to live there for twelve years of my childhood...
well gonna go oil up the old bike chain.. might be back I don't know..
best wishes and many blessings...
Russ
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