Gee it's been real difficult to journal last couple of days...I mean what the hey, first of March.... I've moved around a lot in my life... made friends and moved away... not real sure what I was running from... back then... my grandmother, myself or my ex's boyfriends lol... not that i ran from those twerps... just moved her butt off so she have to make new ones lol... mean aint I...
I'm not too sorry about my life... as a kid I made a few mistakes, some I'm not too proud of... but hey, takes two to tango... and the very young do not always do as they are told..
That old fart I see in the mirror... with that big toothless grinn, cause I gotta grin when I see him... looks kinda like my brother, an whole bunch like my mom with a beard... yepp... fur real...
So mom wasn't cute in her old age... but hey we had a ruff life lol... yeah she weighted in at 400 pounds couple times too... sure miss her... been a while but I think of her often... nawe we weren't close... I never had a close motherly relationship with mom or her mom who raised me...
Love is like a wild flower, it grows in some of the harshest places...wind blown or troded down, it seems to come back and bloom against all odds...
I think my love for my mom and grandmother was kinda like a wild flower... growin n the crack of the concrete...
Now my love for my wife was a much more delicate flower... needed lots of attention, and dang I really tried, i watered and used miracle grow... lol... even talked to it... some old fart snatched it away... while I was hiding in my room....
At least the wild flower stills blooms... in my heart... for my mom and grandmother...
DS has been like a garden, filled with so many different beautiful flowers... roses and daisies for you ladies and daffydills and danilions for you fellows lol... since we talkin flowers my favorite is the honeysuckle... so small and delicate and full of sweetness... use to lay under the honeysuckle...sweet memories...
funny how memories become more precious as we grow older, or maybe it's just me...
When I read the journals of my friends, sometimes I cheer, and sometimes I feel like I'm whinin too much... most of the time I'm hurtin like all get out... some times i could just lay down and well it gets so bad sometimes I don't know whether to fart or go blind... but... some of you face much more than I do... and your courage and determination really makes me try harder...
So any way... there you have it my ramblings for the day... sure hope you all have a good day... pain free would be a blessing... best wishes and many blessing Russ
I'm not too sorry about my life... as a kid I made a few mistakes, some I'm not too proud of... but hey, takes two to tango... and the very young do not always do as they are told..
That old fart I see in the mirror... with that big toothless grinn, cause I gotta grin when I see him... looks kinda like my brother, an whole bunch like my mom with a beard... yepp... fur real...
So mom wasn't cute in her old age... but hey we had a ruff life lol... yeah she weighted in at 400 pounds couple times too... sure miss her... been a while but I think of her often... nawe we weren't close... I never had a close motherly relationship with mom or her mom who raised me...
Love is like a wild flower, it grows in some of the harshest places...wind blown or troded down, it seems to come back and bloom against all odds...
I think my love for my mom and grandmother was kinda like a wild flower... growin n the crack of the concrete...
Now my love for my wife was a much more delicate flower... needed lots of attention, and dang I really tried, i watered and used miracle grow... lol... even talked to it... some old fart snatched it away... while I was hiding in my room....
At least the wild flower stills blooms... in my heart... for my mom and grandmother...
DS has been like a garden, filled with so many different beautiful flowers... roses and daisies for you ladies and daffydills and danilions for you fellows lol... since we talkin flowers my favorite is the honeysuckle... so small and delicate and full of sweetness... use to lay under the honeysuckle...sweet memories...
funny how memories become more precious as we grow older, or maybe it's just me...
When I read the journals of my friends, sometimes I cheer, and sometimes I feel like I'm whinin too much... most of the time I'm hurtin like all get out... some times i could just lay down and well it gets so bad sometimes I don't know whether to fart or go blind... but... some of you face much more than I do... and your courage and determination really makes me try harder...
So any way... there you have it my ramblings for the day... sure hope you all have a good day... pain free would be a blessing... best wishes and many blessing Russ
Replies
I think our memories become more precious, and we hold onto them so tightly, because at some point as we grow older, we quit making as many. I don\'t know why that is, unless our lives become less eventful and more cut off. I think that\'s the answer for me anyway.It\'s sometimes easier to look to the past than to the future which is full of uncertainty. The past is like a familiar friend whether the memories are good or bad. It\'s our history and remains constant & unchanged. It\'s why we can remember in detail the smallest event from the past and yet not remember what we had for breakfast. And each step has formed and molded us to the person we are today. I use to think, if I could go back I would change this or that, but in all actuality how could you? To change just one thing might change it all as every cause has an effect and so on. If I had\'nt married I would\'nt have my two beautiful children etc. I\'m content to leave the past as it is and be grateful for the good times I found along the way. And now, even disabled, I can find beauty in a sunset or watching the deer in my back yard. I can enjoy an old Hank Williams tune and remember when I use to dance to them. Even if I can\'t dance anymore, I\'m free to in my mind. I watch my Grandchildren grow and change as I once did my own children and I feel blessed to have them and be a part of their lives. And I\'m sure these moments too will someday become precious memories......Just my thoughts. Love you, Dale