I sorry for sharing the terrible abuse of my past with everyone... I don't like to share that a lot...
The reason was to try and explain why, I have such a terrible time with pain and depression... I fight depression constantly just like the chronic pain... remember I take no pain medicines I was turned down again this week for something to really help the pain, they don't even want to give me Motrin anymore... GO figure... So It's grin and bear it....
big toothless grinn...
So anyways, i'm sorry to put you thru the horror I lived.
Believe me I havent even touched the tip of that iceburg...
I moved on... just runnin on bald tires lol maypops... It's been raining here for last three days...
the 10/10 is the pain scale they use at the clinic i go too... so yeah I'm having a bad day, aint like it's new lol... I just do one day at a time...
It is really hard to stay sane sometimes...
so i go insane lol... lucky me...
best wishes and thank you all for your support...
((((((((((group Hug ))))))))))))))
Russ
still 10/10
The reason was to try and explain why, I have such a terrible time with pain and depression... I fight depression constantly just like the chronic pain... remember I take no pain medicines I was turned down again this week for something to really help the pain, they don't even want to give me Motrin anymore... GO figure... So It's grin and bear it....
big toothless grinn...
So anyways, i'm sorry to put you thru the horror I lived.
Believe me I havent even touched the tip of that iceburg...
I moved on... just runnin on bald tires lol maypops... It's been raining here for last three days...
the 10/10 is the pain scale they use at the clinic i go too... so yeah I'm having a bad day, aint like it's new lol... I just do one day at a time...
It is really hard to stay sane sometimes...
so i go insane lol... lucky me...
best wishes and thank you all for your support...
((((((((((group Hug ))))))))))))))
Russ
still 10/10
Replies
Good Morning, Russ.....
Hope your day goes well and that your pain eases....
Take care.........:)
Linda
You should\'nt be sorry for sharing anything Russ! That\'s why we have a journal and also why we have friends. We all need understanding and encouragment whether it\'s something from the past or the present. You have alot of issues and sometimes we just need to get it out, and talking helps. I don\'t understand why they won\'t give you anything for your pain? Do they even give you a reason? Without my pain meds I would\'nt even be able to function. I can\'t imagine how you deal with it........Do you take anything for your depression? Hang in there my friend. I am always here if you need to talk. Love, Dale
Russ we all need to unload sometimes.There isnt one person in DS that I know that hasnt had the need to do that including myself.
I have always heard that in order to defeat our emotional tormentors is to first be able to recognize them and you do.You know what has caused your emotional pain.The physical pain is something that only your own body can deal with...that and meds of course.
The best way to numb the emotional tormentors is to not allow them rule over your memory.Iam positive that you have many more good memories to put before them bad ones.
Think on the laughter your wonderful wit and things that make you happy.Linger there more often its a awesome mood lifter,and you will soon break the cycle of the tormentors coming in to attack you.
Snuf them out before they get a chance to get at you.You play video games you know how to defeat the enemy in those games.It works the same way control over the evil that loves to eat at us.
But as far as talking about it you it dont hurt anything as long as you dont let it eat your lunch.To heck with it kick it to the curb bud.You got a life to live we all do that is... whats left of it for all of us.
Be determined to make the very best of it that you can.Start with doing some good things for yourself.I dont care if its an icecream treat once a week,or a daily walk or a drive.
Plan to get out of the house get some fresh air meet some new friends and share some good times with others.
You have a very pleasant nature and you are a very intertaining person I know people do like you and enjoy being your friend.
Be good to yourself and take care.
Rachel
Russ why not try some over the counter motrin it would be better then nothing for your pain.Pain meds are addictive which could be some of the reasons why you are having a hard time getting a script for them.
Sorry about that..but hot tub soaks and OTC might help a little.
Rachel
Oh I\'ve used the over the counter stuff...Just takes so manyto work, I\'m trying to get them to renew my subscription for the 800mg time released, I cut em in half and only use them when it\'s no other way to go.... (pain city) they don\'t tell me a whole lot... except it hard on the stomach... geeesh my stomach can take... i oughtta know been takin Motrin since 1993 gosh ..awe poooowie...
It\'s let up tad bit today... I\'m more of a 6 or 7 /10 now, feels way better..went shoppin bought me a new shirt, some earphones and three pair of brief by hanes that will sail a small yatch lol... well at least if i ever go sailin lol... I\'ll be wearing a back up lol.... Russ
Hello good buddy :-) Please don\'t ever apologize for what you post in your journal. It is your journal and the feelings are real. Always helps to let it out and where else but your journal to do it. Chronic pain and depression are 2 things I know that are hard to have to deal with on a daily basis but not impossible! I am happy you have this place to help you through some of it. We may fall sometimes but what is important is that we keep getting up brushing ourselves off and keep going the best that we can. Just noone wants to see their friends go through so much. I could say so much more but your friends have pretty much said it all already. Just keep being you! After all that is the person we become to enjoy and care about. We all have those journal posts we aren\'t so sure about posting. The important thing is that you keep being you and you have learnt some important lessons and love is one of the greatest gifts you can receive. You have many gifts to offer, I just hope one day you see all of them and see what a great guy you really are!! Your past is not who you are!!
As for your pain and not receiving any help with it, as a chronic pain sufferer myself I would be totally insane all the time!!! :-) Good to see you got out and treated yourself to some things, you should do that more often! Gosh there I went again...jabbering away lol...sorry! I hope the rain passes and the pain eases. Like you said one day at a time....best wishes to you too and thank you for your support and friendship!!! Have a great day and take good care of you!!
Good for you Iam glad that you went shopping.Even a small little something you buy yourself is a good thing.Hope you can get that prescription renewed soon.
Keep trucking!!