This weekend has been wooly for me. Friday when I went to Russ Juniors, I pulled up beside this car at the red lite. Fellow was smokin and the smoke blew rite in my face, got a good whiff of that old tobaccy smell...................
saturday, It's rainy, my sinuses are givine me fits cause i got too close to a smoker............ old ticker might be givin me fits, kinda short on breath, so I laid down and used my breating machine several times yesterday........................
Sunday, It's still overcast, I'm still haveing some chest pains and shortness of breath, so stiff and achey all over like the flu.................I don't know what the kid done to this dang computer it sure don't act right.................High speed internet, quickest boots in the west lol................. check the mail and get booted, sign on DS get booted..........................guess ya get what you pay for, sides, seems like when ya feel bad everything goes haywire...................can't find no happy medium today.
I dont much feel like I belong today........ just want to hide in my room, did that, had nitemares, between the headache, chest pain, neck and shoulders pain, the stiffness, and my face feels like it's in a vice..................I hate being perched up here on top the fence.......... like an old alley cat squallin in the nite, rather be howling at the moon lol...... least all four feet would be on the ground.........I don't feel very well balanced today, I'm tired plum dam tired..... poooofff#
saturday, It's rainy, my sinuses are givine me fits cause i got too close to a smoker............ old ticker might be givin me fits, kinda short on breath, so I laid down and used my breating machine several times yesterday........................
Sunday, It's still overcast, I'm still haveing some chest pains and shortness of breath, so stiff and achey all over like the flu.................I don't know what the kid done to this dang computer it sure don't act right.................High speed internet, quickest boots in the west lol................. check the mail and get booted, sign on DS get booted..........................guess ya get what you pay for, sides, seems like when ya feel bad everything goes haywire...................can't find no happy medium today.
I dont much feel like I belong today........ just want to hide in my room, did that, had nitemares, between the headache, chest pain, neck and shoulders pain, the stiffness, and my face feels like it's in a vice..................I hate being perched up here on top the fence.......... like an old alley cat squallin in the nite, rather be howling at the moon lol...... least all four feet would be on the ground.........I don't feel very well balanced today, I'm tired plum dam tired..... poooofff#
Replies
I\'m back took a breather lol... actually laid down wore my mask blowed rasberrys in my sleep... cause i dozed off.. still feel like yuck.... achey all over.... so I\'m back hopein I wont feel so all alone, everybody must get .... see singin in misery lol....
Hi Russ its rachel,
I have been off the net for almost all of last week.I had a very rare visit with my younger sister and was so happy to reserve my time devoted to her visit.We had a great time but,I missed my special friends on DS and it feels good to be back and to read your journals again.
Iam very concerned about your chest pains that you mentioned.Please take care of yourself and if you dont feel better very soon do go to the doctor and get yourself checked?
Do you have a blood pressure machine to check your blood pressure? If so keep a check and relax and try not to worry about issues that we humans cant fix.Sometimes all it causes us is stress and stress causes our hearts extra pressure.
Believe me everything is going to be alright.God has a way where there seems to be no way russ.Just when we reach the end of our rope and hopes he will come shining through for us.I know life for you isnt easy.. we as your friends share your pain and your concerns some of us know exactly what you are going through.
There is nothing worse then having health issues and financial problems combined together.It makes us feel like our tomorrows arent worth living..
But they are my dear friend.I read in one of your many interesting journals,where you was talking about a bird you was holding in your hands.I pictured how gentle of a man you must be to reguard the tenderness and care of that bird.
That is the same way that our father in heaven feels toward us and even more so then a bird.
I wont preach because Iam not a pastor but I do believe in god and I know that he is our hope for survival.
I wished I could just sit down and have a good talk with you in person,and go over the good reminders of your life.Sometimes just getting things off your chest can create insite into a persons future plans and dreams.
We all need courage and faith to keep going and reasons to strive.Dont lose site of your dreams.I know you are dreading your son moving on with his life one day.But please know that being alone isnt a bad thing.Its so peaceful to have that space with ourselves sometimes and to be on a one on one with our creator.You will always belong russ even if you feel that you dont somedays.
Dont feel bad because you share your pain with us you are far from being an old complaining alley cat.You need the support of your friends here in DS and pain is part of why we are all here together.
Dont worry about spacing,paragraphs or imperfections just write your journals being who you are the way you are.
Orginality is what makes us all the unique individuals that we are.
I wish you wellness today,I wish you up lifted spirits,peace and hope.
God bless you my friend.
Rachel
Hey you go ahead and preach if you want, we are all Gods vessels...hope that made sense... Yeah I was feelin kinds rough, gee well really rough, now it\'s kinds ruff, like a three dog nite.... that\'s kinda bad.... Hey did you email me any zukeeny bread.... don\'t ya love my spellin. Well giving up is not in my vocabulary, even tho the thought crosses my mind, then I just grab hold and pray... I\'m glad you had a wonderful visit with your sister...My dysfunctional family is depressing, maybe some day they will reach out... Oldest brother disappeared don\'t know where he went... nuff that... Yeah it nice to hear from you... I\'m hangin in here, just a real bad day, pain off the scale. thank you for caring, all of you on DS that don\'t let me give up... Ya my DS family... Russ
Its nice to hear from you too.So sorry that your days arnt up to par pain wise.I will remember you in my prayers for your total situation.When the weather gets drier you will feel better.For me the weather plays a large role in how my joint pain feels.This past month was the wettest month yet and I went through an aweful time.Thank god now its drier and I\'m better and Iam so thankful for the short reprive...
Well drats if I didnt help my sister eat all that zucchini bread russ.It was so good we kind of loss our self control LOL.But I have the recipe for you if you ever feel like making some,its real easy.
You know Iam not a quiter eather russ even though I have been through some days that I felt completely doomed.But In my darkest hours I reach out to find that tied knot at the end of the rope.That same knot I tied last time I passed through.I hold on for dear life until the bad times pass\'s.Because they always do if we dont give up.
Hope is a little word with the biggest meaning when we are going through bad times.God I dont know where I would be without hope do you?
I understand about your brother and disfunctional family.My wonderful visit with my sister was answered prayer russ.I actually prayed for years for god to heal her mind, and allow us to be the kind of sisters that we was meant to be.You have no idea of the disfunctional differances I have had with her.This is the first time she has been to my home to just visit in 17 years.
I havent been invited to her home in years because she felt her home was beneath mine. :\\ She has some major hangups with not feeling on my same level so she explained when she was here.She compared her life to mine for years,and it took her no where neither did it change life.
I think she finally saw that I was still her loving sister through it all when she was here.She broke down and cried seeing what shes missed all those years in our relationship.Takes some people a long time to wake up russ maybe your bro is having simulair problem.Who knows why people think crazy things they convience themselves of silly thoughts and live miserable all in their own little box\'s.
So yes I know all about disfunctional its in every family.
Well I need to scoot hold on and get throught the night and tomorrow the sun will shine again.
Rachel
What a wonderful Read that was....Russ, hope you wake up feeling much better and stronger today, and, Rachael, thank you for that place in DS that you suggested to Russ.....heading there RIGHT now..:)
Sweet Dreams to you both.....good reading!!
Linda :)
Russ, honey, thank you for the lines........helped the old girl out!!.......;-)
God, sometimes someone has to draw me a PICTURE......never ever THOUGHT to look under the treatment of the home page itself......Thanks for sharing that!!....
Couldn\'t find exactly the specific page, but learned something.......:)
Hey there, don\'t you think you should get those aches and pains checked out by your doc? I think you should. Puters are pains, mine has a mind of it\'s own and usually crashes just when I\'ve got important emails to send, or...I need to pay a bill. Just love em eh?
Take care of yourself Russ, thinking about you. Sandi
When It rains it pours, how the heck do the battery on two vechiles go dead at the same time, when no body been messin with em, Wow......Oh hey I\'m not feeling a lot better pain wise but I\'m feeling a lot loved thanks. It so wonderful to not feel alone, song on my heart this moanin (I\'m only in it for the Love) ole Conway T. maybe Ya\'ll heard him sing lol....