I am a sci-fi fan. One of my favorite was the X-Files. Mulder had a poster in his office that read. I WANT TO BELIEVE. The other day I was watching reruns from hell. Fox recieved that poster in the show from some one he met online. The point being is I WANT TO BELIEVE. There are so many things I want to believe. One of which is I want to believe in myself. My beliefs in a creator, and or life in the Universe. Well no problem there. Hey even the bible describes several other life form besides we little humans here on earth. I find that belief in myself is fading. My uncertainties grow stronger. Pain lately with all the weather changes going on are way hard to deal with. My anger flares, I feel so cut off from the rest of the world. These ears that I have. They are of little use. I can wiggle them. They whisle and ring. They make me smile. I've had some pretty funny comment made about my ears during the years. My first love would softly blow into my ear to get my attention. Yeah guess I won't be forgetting that. Then who ever forgets their first Love. Or the second or third. Then there is the ex lol. I think about her a lot. NO not mean things. Wonderful things, lots of wonderful moments that being a family is all about. 25 years of... Oh well onward funny how talking about my ears led to memories of Love. BETTER TO HAVE LOVED. ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE. MONEY CAN'T BUY ME LOVE. Well NOW you can see just how unstable old Russ really is lol. Yepp I'm crazier than a Loon. One of the most wonderful things in LIFE, that I have is music. I love music. Country, classical, ROCK AND ROLL. I want to play the paino, but my teacher refused because my hands were too stiff. That was in the fifth grade. Like I said I've been in pain a long looonnnggg time. I tried to teach myself to play the guitar, got pretty good too. long as no one was watching. By the time I was confident enough to play in public or for friends. My hands were so bad I couldn't finger the notes and cords properly. But hey, music is in my soul. I played a tenor saxophone in the high school band. I was good with the sax. It's just the way life goes. I have music playing in my mind. Lord I was born a rambling man, trying to make a liveing and doing the best I can. All I'm trying to say is to have a nice day. I hope it don't rain on your parade. When it all comes down I hope it don't fall on youuuu. Don't remember who sang it but it played for about a week back in 71. Hope it don't rain on your parade. Russ...Oh my oldest son, is getting married next saturday.