Hi folks, well what can I say. It seems I have come to that time of year again where the seasons hate me, or rather the end of the year starts to hate me. I have just started at university and already mental problems seem strife. I don't know what to do, this is something I've wanted to do all my life and already I'm not sleeping well (when I do sleep), I just cant rest, relax and constantly getting more and more anxious. I know I have S.A.D, but I was hoping that it wouldn't come back, but for the past four to five years its been there for quite a while, its doesn't seem like its got any intention of leaving me be. I just don't know what to do, I go into class and don't learn anything, I hang round with my friends and I just feel so anxious, I get out of bed in a morning, and this is the sad bit, I just want to stay there, I don't want to see or talk to anyone, I'm just waiting for the whole world to just eat me up and then to disappear out of existance. I just don't know what to say, I'm trying my hardest, and this course, it ain't cheap, I can't afford to fail either financially or any other way. I am just scared, they're asking me to be organised, they are asking me to be able to write neatly, they seem to be asking a lot and I don't know if I can do all they are asking. I don't know what to do anymore, I talk to my mum, she doesn't listen, I try and talk to some of my friends, but I don't know how to explain it, or in some cases I feel like they are looking down on me, I always try my hardest but sometimes 'motivation is such an aggravation' I just don't know what to do, what to say, or how to get myself out of the frame of mind of being constantly tired, having no energy. I don't know how, mentally speaking, I am going to turn my mindset around. There must be something I can do, I listen to music but as soon as the music stops I'm back where I started. Any ideas...? Riddles
Replies
oh goodness Riddles.....well, all I can do is send a big HUG to you but it is so hard to know how to help. I dont know, but you sound very much like I was when I was younger and came up against deadlines of any sort - I had enormous lack of confidence when faced with \'proving\' I could do anything. Is think this was the dyslexia-dyspraxia rearings its head, looking back, with the problems all the time I had from school. Later in life, I was put in touch with a cognitive behaviour therapist, who looked at why I felt so continually anxious and overwhelmed with things - and she really helped loads - have you tried this? at that point, I was much older and she told me I had sorted my life out well for someone who suffered so badly from agorophobia, in that I ran my own business from home ! I think that, over the many years I have learned more about myself and how I tick - and I dont try to be like anyone else, accept myself if you like and have now reached a good place. However, I dont think you can wait till you are 66..LOL.........what help do you get? do you see a therapist at all? BUT it needs to be a good one, I had several people who did me nothing but harm. See what other people say - but I do think eventually this comes down to knowing your idiosyncrasies well, and learning to handle them bit by bit, and also accepting yourself as absolutely ok in your own right, if a bit eccentric...*smiling*.....so, I dont think that is a help - but I would say get some sensible help from a caring professional person - and I hope much that the SAD disappears, a difficult time of year for you....huggs Cathrynn X
Thank you
Riddles