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so much for taking the right steps, for making an effort to do the right things. i felt on edge in a bad way, i felt if i wasn't in hospital bad things were going to happen. they sent me home. i waited and called and waited for the hospital's p-doc to return from his holiday...they told me they don't accept my insurance tough luck and suggested i call the hospital back. called the hospital again they told me to go to the emergency room. went to the emergency room and waited for four hours in a supply cupboard (okay they call it "small conference room A," but it's obviously where they store all the reams of paperwork and stationery supplies needed in the emergency department. after 4 hours i figured they were just going to leave me there to rot so i left. called another p-doc office this morning. finally got a call back...they're affiliated with p-doc #1 and do not accept my insurance. sooo.....what next? i'm trying very hard to keep an even keel, but the thought slips in more often than i'm comfortable with that if i should top myself off my family would have a helluva lawsuit to bring against the p-docs and the hospitals.  not planning anything, but i am hurting and want it to stop.